What's Mallard raving about today?
Women, Books
Frankly, after a day like today it makes me question my career choices when I realize someone gets paid to simply document their smug superiority in excruciating detail, with no artistic, literary, or humorous merit.
18 comments:
And we're back to that weird, disturbing peek into the sick fetishes of Bruce Tinsley, as Chantel, tiring of her relationship with a duck, actively attempts to hook the animal up with her, uh, friends? It's Mallard we're talking about here. Duck or human, friends don't hook friends up with douchebags.
Mallard's favorite books are Atlas Shrugged (movie tie-in edition), The Bell Curve, and fifteen-Pulitzer-Prize-winning author Jonah Goldberg's Liberal Fascism. 'Nuff said.
And Tinsley's said his favorite drinks are "fifths"...
You can't fool Mallard. He's never heard the word "trilogy" before, so he knows it's a made-up word.
Tog, I'd be unsurprised to learn that Chantel is fixing him up with her enemies, as you implied.
Um. "Trilogies" is a perfectly cromulent answer. An author takes the story, a typical three-act structure,and expounds on each act enough to warrant the whole story's division in to three books. Not a difficult concept.
She likes trilogies, because she likes long, epic stories, with deep characters in a nuance world. If she doesn't have a favorite, it's probably because she read a -lot- of series and doesn't have one singled out.
Of course, Mallard's lizard brain doesn't understand any of this. No, there must be a solid, black and white, "Best". Preferably in short format that you can read in an afternoon stay at the drunk tank. Complexity? Ow, that hurts my thinking!
Firstly: If setting them up on dates with Mallard is what Chantel does to her friends, I shudder to think of what she must do to her enemies.
Secondly: I thought you liked teenaged girls, Mallard. You certainly spend enough time stalking them at the bookstore.
If she had said, "I don't read books I only watch Fox News", Mallard would have proposed on the spot.
Not having read Twilight or 50 Shades of Gray, which I assume are the targets here, I can't comment on whatever literary or other artistic merits or lack of same they may have.
But can they suck as bad as the Wingnut Duck Chronicles here? I doubt it.
Tinsley thinks a book with two sequels is a trilogy.
The Twilight "Saga" was four books, so if that's what Mallard is referring to (and I think it is) he's just showing us how lame and unaware of pop culture he is (as usual).
Mallard's just jealous. He can't read above the "Fox News for Dummies" level.
Steve-O,
As much as it pains me to be fair to Brews, he's not the one who said Twilight was a trilogy; I was. But in that case, what's a trilogy these days besides the 50 shades of beige thing?
CW in LA,
I think you're right though, I think he IS referring to Twilight. That's how stupid he is.
I suspect this is more about Hunger Games, which I believe is a trilogy.
DiR,
Maybe you're right. If that's true then Mallard really is a dumbass. The Hunger Games was an excellent trilogy. If Mallard read them he might learn something.
Aww, man, I forgot about the Hunger Games, and both The Missus and my students have been urging me to read it. Of course, one difference between me and the Tinsh is that I see no reason to be smug about not having gotten to it, at least not yet (I have of course no hesitation about feeling smug in my superiority to the Tinsh).
Well gee, it's asking a lot for Tinsley to read ONE book, let alone three.
Has anyone see Mallard Fillmore read a book, anytime?
What *is* his favorite book, anyway?
("Atlas Shrugged" perhaps, by the welfare queen/drug addict/Jesus hater?)
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