Those damned habbers

What's Mallard raving about today?

Rehab, celebrities.

Mallard rests his premise on the precarious premise that substance abuse is the exclusive domain of celebrity. In Mallard's world, average Americans do not exhibit the same tendencies towards substance abuse and rehab. Admittedly, the average American may not be able to afford Betty Ford for rehab, but the remainder of that premise is flimsy, at best.

As a side note, I admit I learned something new from Mallard: apparently the kids these days are referring to it as "habbing."

Those damned makeover shows

What's Mallard raving about today?

Wally, Makeover Shows, self-help groups.

From Mallard's biography: "He thinks average, hardworking Americans need a break instead of a lecture."

If that's the case, champion of the average, hardworking American, stop lecturing us about what we should and should not watch on TV.

Will this week never end?

That damned Sun

What's Mallard raving about today?

The Sun, Global Warming, Hollywood, Rehab.

Unfortunately for Mallard his smear job against Global Warming, linking it with Hollywood celebrities, is not going to work these days, since he is actually in the distinct minority with his Flat Earth beliefs.

According to Fox News (yes, Fox News) :

...77 percent of Americans believe global warming is happening and, of those, more than twice as many think it is caused by human behavior (46 percent) than by normal climate patterns (17 percent). About a third says it is a combination of both (30 percent).

Mallard is going to need new talking points, and might want to look to a source a bit more reliable than Newsmax.com for scientific information.

For example, the Newsmax article is based in part on a report from National Geographic featuring the following which did not appear in the Newsmax article.

"His views are completely at odds with the mainstream scientific opinion," said Colin Wilson, a planetary physicist at England's Oxford University. "And they contradict the extensive evidence presented in the most recent IPCC [Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change] report."

Amato Evan, a climate scientist at the University of Wisconsin, Madison, added that "the idea just isn't supported by the theory or by the observations."

Perhaps the biggest stumbling block in Abdussamatov's theory is his dismissal of the greenhouse effect, in which atmospheric gases such as carbon dioxide help keep heat trapped near the planet's surface. He claims that carbon dioxide has only a small influence on Earth's climate and virtually no influence on Mars. But "without the greenhouse effect there would be very little, if any, life on Earth, since our planet would pretty much be a big ball of ice," said Evan, of the University of Wisconsin.

That damned Larry

What's Mallard raving about today?

Addiction, Rehab.

Hiiiiiii "Larry"