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Saturday, June 30, 2012

That damned Accusation

What's Mallard raving about today?

Social Darwinism, Fish

Mallard, if you are going to object to accusations of something like Social Darwinism, it helps to know what it means.

Small Middle Class fish running away from voracious JP Morgan Predator fish is NOT the example of Social Darwinism your masters want you to espouse.

Friday, June 29, 2012

Those damned Noses

What's Mallard raving about today?

Comic Superheroes

Frankly, I'm surprised Mallard lasted this long before that whole Gay Green Lantern thing started bugging him again.

Thursday, June 28, 2012

That damned Cup

What's Mallard raving about today?

Obese People, Cups

In this case, in which we are subjected to splayed duck crotch, "Viewer Discretion is Advised" is less a punchline than a label.

Wednesday, June 27, 2012

That damned Debate

What's Mallard raving about today?

President Obama

This is fabulously disingenuous (e.g., a lie) considering that, when placed in it's actual context, what President Obama said was that while the economy was struggling, the private sector was doing better than the public sector as a result of Republican cut-backs in public spending.

Also, considering the flip-flopping Etch-a-Sketch the Republicans have chosen as their standard barrier, it's a wonder Mallard is not being struck by lightning for the egregiousness of his lies.

Tuesday, June 26, 2012

That damned School

What's Mallard raving about today?

Speech, Congress, Schools

Careful, Mallard...the 1% do not like to be challenged by their water carriers.

Monday, June 25, 2012

That damned Speech

What's Mallard raving about today?

Congress, 10th Graders

Making fun of 10th graders for the way they speak puts Mallard Fillmore at about a 4th grade level...and that's being generous.

(Oh, and, Mallard...according to the study your beloved Republicans speak about a half grade level worse than Democrats. Just saying.)

Sunday, June 24, 2012

That Damned Model

What's Mallard raving about today?

Federal Agencies, Mammals, Dinosaurs

For God's sake, Mallard, do you even understand the English language?

Right Wingers like yourself describe Federal Agencies as dinosaurs because they wish to de-fund them, and then, once de-funded, claim Government Agencies just don't work.

They are not "modeled" after dinosaurs.

Saturday, June 23, 2012

That damned Plan

What's Mallard raving about today?

Green Lantern, Hollywood

And, somehow, this comes back to the victim complex of Mallard and the modern Republican Party.

But...Mel Gibson is as Republican as the day is long. Problem solved.

Friday, June 22, 2012

That damned Mission

What's Mallard raving about today?

Green Lantern, Homosexuals

And, there we have it...Mallard has reached the point where he's saying that saving the world from a Super Villain is easier than portraying someone as gay without resorting to crude stereotypes.

But, you know, like with racism, it's everyone else who has a problem, not Mallard.

Thursday, June 21, 2012

That damned Lycra

What's Mallard raving about today?

Green Lantern

As is typical, the longer Mallard continues on this topic, the more blatantly offensive he gets.

At the start, you could charitably read what he was saying as chastising DC for thinking someone being Gay was even shocking.

But now, it's pretty clear he's just being a hateful bigot, though he still chose to say "fly around in the air" rather than going all the way and saying "mince around."

Wednesday, June 20, 2012

Tuesday, June 19, 2012

That damned Reaction

What's Mallard raving about today?

Green Lantern

Is Mallard Fillmore actually saying that announcements that someone is gay are no longer worthy of note since homosexuality is know of normal?

Because I'm pretty sure that'll get you branded as a heretic in the GOP.

Monday, June 18, 2012

Sunday, June 17, 2012

That damned Answer

What's Mallard raving about today?


Leave it to Mallard to make a political point out of Father's Day. Also, leave it to Mallard to cite a government child welfare site when criticizing the government.

But, beyond all that...what is your suggestion when the child does not have a Dad who loves and cares for him/her, Mallard?

According to Republican doctrine, exemplified by Representative Ryan's budget plan, your plan appears to be: fuck them and cut all funding to help them so billionaires can keep more of their money.

But, perhaps I am missing a nuance somewhere.

Saturday, June 16, 2012

That damned Pat on the Head

What's Mallard raving about today?

Only Mallard knows

And, so, on June 16, 2012, Mallard Fillmore officially crossed the line from whatever he was previously into a comic equivalent of that schizophrenic drunk guy on the corner with sign so full of conspiracy theories that you can't possibly read it as you walks past him.


Friday, June 15, 2012

That damned Rumor

What's Mallard raving about today?

Hillary Clinton, Joe Biden

In 2008, the rift between Candidate Obama and Hillary Clinton was going to doom his Presidential bid, according to concern-troll Mallard.

In 2012, the rift is between Secretary of State Clinton and Vice President Biden.

Plus, Vice President Biden is a font of slurs and obscenities. There are after all, upwards of 2 specific examples Mallard can point to in the last 6 years.

In a nutshell, this is the level of rational thought of which Mallard Fillmore is capable.

Wednesday, June 13, 2012

That damned Poll

What's Mallard raving about today?

Supreme Court, Americans

Over 80% of Republicans in Alabama and Mississippi believe President Obama is not a Christian. And over 60% don't believe in Evolution.

So what is your point?

Tuesday, June 12, 2012

That damned Name Change

What's Mallard raving about today?


Day 2 of Mallard's "Making Fun of People's Names" series. If this lasts into Day 3, I may have to stop posting.

Monday, June 11, 2012

Those damned Names

What's Mallard raving about today?

Baby Names

45 words, just to make fun of someone's unusual name. Bravo. Haven't been exposed to something that witty since the 2nd grade. Your parents must be so proud.

Sunday, June 10, 2012

That damned Little Stuff

What's Mallard raving about today?

Voter ID Laws

I mean, it's not like, historically, Voter ID Laws have ever been used to keep anyone from legitimately voting, right?

Plus, there's mountains of evidence showing massive voter fraud, right?

Saturday, June 09, 2012

Friday, June 08, 2012

Thursday, June 07, 2012

That damned Job

What's Mallard raving about today?

Jobs, Education

Was it really necessary to add "Drive-Thru"? Wouldn't "McDonald's" suffice?

Wednesday, June 06, 2012

That damned Wake-Up Call

What's Mallard raving about today?

Students, American Idol, Supreme Court

After Citizens United, I support that idea. The Supreme Court could hardly become a worse, more partisan institution.

Tuesday, June 05, 2012

That damned Darwinism

What's Mallard raving about today?

Social Darwinism

At a time when only 40% of Republicans think we should help people who can't help themselves, it's simply accurate labeling to call their policies Social Darwinism.

Monday, June 04, 2012

Those damned Kids

What's Mallard raving about today?

High School Kids

With no hint of irony at all, Mallard Fillmore is decrying "these kids today."

Based on this evidence, Mallard has no right decrying inefficiency in Government as it appears he works for the least efficient business in human history, one which tolerates levels of under-performance which are unthinkable.

Sunday, June 03, 2012

That damned Triceratops

What's Mallard raving about today?

Stand Your Ground Laws

George Zimmerman is a smirking but peaceful Triceratops while Trayvon Martin was a vicious T-Rex.

Welcome to Republican America.

Saturday, June 02, 2012

That damned Drawing

What's Mallard raving about today?

Mitt Romney

Oooh! Oooh! I can draw Mitt Romney!


 $   $

You're welcome.