Project Wonderful Banner

Tuesday, July 31, 2012

That damned Vacation

What's Mallard raving about today?

No idea, but I am sure it's a lightning rod for controversy.

Sunday, July 29, 2012

That damned Vacation

What's Mallard raving about today?

I don't care.

Saturday, July 28, 2012

That damned Tank Top

What's Mallard raving about today?

Tank Tops

After a day of over-compensating for forgetting July 4 via Patriotic chest-thumping, Mallard is back to dispensing fashion advice, in true lightning-rod fashion.

Friday, July 27, 2012

That damned Day

What's Mallard raving about today?

The Troops

You know what would be a good day to thank the troops? Independence Day.

You know, July 4?

The day you decided to bitch about trilogies instead.

Thursday, July 26, 2012

That damned Story

What's Mallard Fillmore raving about today?

Top Stories.

Newspapers all across America just published a strip about Mallard Fillmore's porn-surfing habits.

Wednesday, July 25, 2012

That damned Editing

What's Mallard raving about today?

Editing, Smoking

Mallard may yet live up to his billing as "a lightning rod for controversy" given that he wants to return to the halcyon days of the 1950s and market smoking to children.

Tuesday, July 24, 2012

Those damned Hips

What's Mallard raving about today?

Pants, Hips

Just a week after decrying regulation of soda, Mallard turns to criticizing fat people, with no hint of irony or any sense of connection between the two.

At this point, Mallard spent 3 days on the Affordable Care Act and 2 (so far) on "Pants: why they annoy me so much" (but people deserve a break, not a lecture).

To recap: Mallard Fillmore continues to be one of the most highly contentious and celebrated comic strips, providing a unique conservative viewpoint to the comics pages. Mallard Fillmore has been a lightning rod for controversy with the right-leaning duck consistently addressing hot button issues and lampooning liberal politicians, the media and cultural establishments.

Monday, July 23, 2012

Those damned Pants

What's Mallard raving about today?

Pants

Mallard Fillmore forgot Independence Day. But he found time to comment on pants.

In all seriousness, I think we're watching, via their incoherent daily ramblings published in comic form,  someone who is sliding into insanity.

Sunday, July 22, 2012

That damned Karl

What's Mallard raving about today?

Location

I honestly have no idea what this is even supposed to be about.

Saturday, July 21, 2012

That damned Stuff

What's Mallard raving about today?

Affordable Care Act, President Obama, Supreme Court

Ummmm...and?

(Even for Mallard Fillmore, this is particularly incomprehensible.)

Friday, July 20, 2012

Those Damned Americans

What's Mallard raving about today?

Affordable Care Act, President Obama

Fact: Approximately 1% of Americans will pay the tax penalty for not purchasing insurance, by their own choice.

Mallard Fillmore: Lying sack of crap

Thursday, July 19, 2012

That damned Tax

What's Mallard raving about today?

Affordable Care Act, President Obama

On the one hand...Thank God, we're moving off this Andrea Mitchell rant, because it was getting embarrassing.

On the other hand...this is going to go one for a while.

Wednesday, July 18, 2012

That damned Puppy

What's Mallard raving about today?

NBC News

Call me crazy, but I don't think you're helping Mitt by reminding us all of how he treated his dog, Mallard.

Tuesday, July 17, 2012

That damned Iced Cream

What's Mallard raving about today?

NBC News

Someone wake me up when Mallard stops repeating himself.

Monday, July 16, 2012

Those damned Emails

What's Mallard raving about today?

NBC News

Given the fact that absolutely no one had Email Mallard by the time this strip came out, Mallard is a projecting a little sensitivity about being a complete liar and/or about water carrying for a pack of liars.

Also, nice citation.

Sunday, July 15, 2012

That damned Cup

What's Mallard raving about today?

Soda

Pssst, Mallard. The man who passed this ban is one of your beloved Job Creators. Are you sure you are allowed to criticize?

Saturday, July 14, 2012

That damned Unicorn

What's Mallard raving about today?

NBC News

Number of times NBC News has been caught in an incident of misleadingly edited video : 1
Number of times NBC News has admitted to that misleadingly edited video: 1
Number of times Fox has been caught in an incident of poorly edited video: too numerous to count
Number of times Fox has admitted to that misleadingly edited video: 0

So what is your point, Mallard?

Friday, July 13, 2012

Those Damned Clothes

What's Mallard raving about today?

NBC News

How dare anyone suggest that a man with a car elevator is out of touch with the serfs...uh, I mean common man.

Thursday, July 12, 2012

Wednesday, July 11, 2012

That damned Sentence

What's Mallard raving about today?

Soft Drink Laws

As has been amply demonstrated on Late Night Television and Comedy Central News, Mayor Bloomberg's soda size event is a rich vein of potential jokes, no matter what you political persuasion or thoughts on the matter.

Mallard Fillmore, predictably, is unable to find that vein. And yet, he still gets paid.

Tuesday, July 10, 2012

That damned Image

What's Mallard raving about today?

EPA

Day Two of "Mallard completely misunderstands simple concepts."

Otherwise knows as Tuesday.


Monday, July 09, 2012

That damned Substance

What's Mallard raving about today?

EPA, Oil refiners

I don't have time to debunk what is no doubt utter nonsense.

In lieu of that, I'll tell you what, Mallard...how about these poor little oil refiners give up their tax breaks first. Then we can talk about doing away with pesky EPA fines for whatever bug Fox has planted up your cloaca.

Sunday, July 08, 2012

That damned Photograph

What's Mallard raving about today?

Chinese Restaurants

But, how do you know they are not serving you dog meat?

Well, it's Sunday and Mallard has missed his last opportunity to mention the 4th of July.

He is now he is officially a traitor; no longer eligible to identify Patriots versus America-Haters, because he is a card-carrying American-Hater who does not remember Independence Day.

Saturday, July 07, 2012

That damned Message

What's Mallard raving about today?

Television

Spoken like someone watching the kind of TV he is decrying.

Hey, anyone know when the 4th of July was? Did it happen to occur on the 4th of July this year?

Friday, July 06, 2012

That damned Support

What's Mallard raving about today?

Taxes

Most Republicans with any kind of a public forum, I believe, know exactly how dishonest they are being when the spout nonsense like this. But since their goal is personal enrichment, their goal is to manipulate the severely gullible and lies are part of the effort.

Mallard Fillmore, by contrast, is in the severely gullible cohort.

Thursday, July 05, 2012

That damned Statistic

What's Mallard raving about today?

Taxes

Gee, I wonder if that has to do with declining incomes driving people into brackets where they end up paying no income tax (although you do pay other taxes, such as Payroll and Social Security)?

Which is of course totally awesome because you don't have to pay taxes! The fact that you don't know where your next meal is coming for is a small price to pay!

Pssssst, Mallard, Republicans have been in control of the White House for almost 60% of that time, so blame them.

Wednesday, July 04, 2012

That damned Trilogy

What's Mallard raving about today?

Trilogies

Mallard Fillmore forgot the 4th of July.


Mallard Fillmore is an America-hating ass hat and is no longer able to claim to be a Patriot, because a Patriot would NEVER forget the 4th of July.


On topic, Mallard Fillmore believes the problem with literature he dislikes is that it comes in three parts. Not surprising that it never occurs to him it could have anything to do with the quality of the writing, since obviously he is not qualified to judge writing.

Tuesday, July 03, 2012

Those damned WASPs

What's Mallard raving about today?

WASPs

When oh, when, will the poor WASPs gain any political representation in this country!

Meanwhile, in the fact-based world...

Monday, July 02, 2012

That damned Border

What's Mallard raving about today?

Immigration

I like the way Mallard casually throws "learn English" in there. Like all legal immigrants are fluent in English and difficulty with English is only a mark of illegal immigration.

I was recently reading a book on the Great Depression and one of the things that struck me most about it is that the same immigrant-bashing was going on then, only it was the Italians and the Irish at the time.

All of which is to say: this isn't about immigration, Mallard. It's thinly (very thinly) veiled hatred of "the Other."

Sunday, July 01, 2012

Those damned Names

What's Mallard raving about today?

Grandparents

Mallard Fillmore manages the almost unthinkable, coming up with a nontroversy that is more inane than what you can find on Fox or Right Wing Blogs.