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Wednesday, July 11, 2012

That damned Sentence

What's Mallard raving about today?

Soft Drink Laws

As has been amply demonstrated on Late Night Television and Comedy Central News, Mayor Bloomberg's soda size event is a rich vein of potential jokes, no matter what you political persuasion or thoughts on the matter.

Mallard Fillmore, predictably, is unable to find that vein. And yet, he still gets paid.


Fuck You, Tinsley said...

Four Loko, the horrible mixture of poison and stimulants that causes heart attacks, is legal under Bloomberg's law. A version of Mountain Dew, a drink that advertises itself as having large amounts of caffeine and sugar may very well be legal under that law. (

I got a PS3 recently, and I was playing Metal Gear Solid 4. I would say that the game is more comprehensible and sensical than most of the recent Mallard Fillmores. Laughing Octopus, Liquid Ocelot, the Gekkos, all make more sense than the comics about Chinese food, Lisa Jackson, immigrants speaking English, etc.

Word Verification: 6 ughboxc, but the best Mallard Fillmore is googleplex ughboxc.

dlauthor said...

Let us all pause and mark the one-week anniversary of the Fourth That Time Forgot.

He's clearly aware of things happening around him, in a somewhat dim, teabaggerish kind of way of course. So it's not like he blacked out completely four weeks ago. Curious to see what the real story is.

dlauthor said...

And by "curious," I mean "pointing and laughing."

CW in LA said...

I think we'll see some oozingly over-compensating More Patriotic Than Thou strips the last week of July, as if cranked out in the wake of an epic hangover in the early afternoon of July 5.

rewinn said...

In real life, "conservatives" are calling for criminalizing ... not merely abortion ... but The Pill, because it prevents a fertilized egg from implanting, and that's killing a human life.

Whenever I bring this up, people scoff because it just sounds too weird, but it's true. Most of y'all are too young to remember when the Pill was illegal but America is headed in that direction when "Life Begins At Conception" is written into law.

DiR said...

@rewinn, Arizona was either trying to, or successfully has, declare that life begins -before- conception.
They were trying to ban abortions after XX weeks post conception. Well, since a conception is actually impossible to pin point, they did the next best thing, and decreed by law that life started on the last day of the woman's period before she became pregnant.
Typically, ovulation takes place two weeks after the end of one's period.

Oh, and Bruce fucking sucks at his job.

rewinn said...

@DiR is right of course. Life begins BEFORE Conception would be a punch line, if it weren't Arizona law.
Maybe this should be a question in the presidential debates. I don't think enough women ... and men who love them ... yet believe that this wackiness is real ... because it's just too wacky.

Kip W [Muffaroo] said...

Damn nanny state! Is there no limit to the things that can be made up about it??