What's Mallard raving about today?
"Called names...?"Oh Jesus Christ, are you kidding me? Is he actually mocking the anti-bullying campaign?!What a shithead. (Aware of the irony, thanks.)
Today Brews decides the toddlers of America deserve a lecture, not a break.
"I am Bruce Tinsley, and there is literally nothing that I don't get pissed off about."
Mal-lard Fill-more does not un-der-stand why the hu-mans use these terms of what you call 'af-fec-tion.' He does not like these e-mo-tions they dis-play to-ward one a-no-ther. The hu-mans make him un-com-for-ta-ble and must stop im-me-di-ate-ly.
Don't worry, Tinshley. When you have grandchildren, your kids won't want them anywhere near you.
This is DEFINITELY controversial and cutting edge! People give their grandparents funny nicknames OMG THE HUMANITY!Thank goodness there was no other political news scheduled to come out this week, e.g. nothing about immigration or health care.P.S. "Goblins" made basically the same joke about funny names back in 2005 but then again, "Goblins" succeeds in a competitive marketplace, unlike Mallard Fillmore.
Oh, and way to speak Truth ti Power, Mallard!
Someone got paid for this.There is no God.
Dear Bruce Tinsley:You're absolutely right. Let's not aloow children to pick names that they can easily pronounce when they are very young as the names they will call their grandparents.We also should be upset at the terms children use for parents, like Mama, Papa, Mom, Dad, Pop, Ma, and Pa (to name just a few).If these children cannot pronounce the words grandfather , grandmother, father, or mother, they must be punished severely, preferably with sharp blows to the body, where the bruises won't show.Bruce Tinsley- go fuck yourself.P.s.- I don't have kids, but my brother and sister both do- in their family, the parents decided what the grandparents would be called, in consultation with the grandparents. In each case, they went with what they had called their own grandparents. I asked around, and this seems to be what most people do.In other words, go fuck yourself. Again.
Our Scots-born grandmother was called "Nana" because that's what she wanted to be called by her grandchildren. We still refer to her as Nana, 20 years after she died.What should I have called her, Mr Angry About Everything Drunken Asshole Man? You're my source for all information, Mr Bruce! Also, if your grandkids call you the fart noise that you use in the last panels, maybe even the toddlers recognize something about you that you don't.Tea and her homemade scones with my Nana! How I still miss that.Brucie's grandkids: "10AM beers and screaming from the drunk with the comic strip no one ever read..."
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