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Tuesday, July 17, 2012

That damned Iced Cream

What's Mallard raving about today?

NBC News

Someone wake me up when Mallard stops repeating himself.


Kip W [Muffaroo] said...

This footage shows Mitt Romney talking backwards while removing an ice cream cone from a nonplussed-looking child's forehead.

Rootbeer said...

This footage shows Chris Christie regurgitating ice cream and challenging one of his constituents to walk towards him and engage in a dialogue.

dlauthor said...

Here's more footage of Romney giving back the kid's dad's job and pension while donating millions of dollars to the company he works for, right before leaving it the fuck alone. And then Mitt receives almost no taxes from the government!

Of course, this whole "backwards Romney" thing would come out the same week that his campaign idiotically introduced the phrase "retroactive retirement" to the political lexicon. Right on the money again there, Bruce!

Oh, and what's this? Another video of Tinshley getting out of his car, walking backwards into a bar, and spitting eight beers into a glass. Eeewwwww.

(Even backwards, though, he still does nothing when July 4 goes and comes.)

dlauthor said...

One more:

Perhaps "Romney undoing things" is not the best joke to be making about the guy who's changed position so many times that even his own campaign staff liken him to an Etch-a-Sketch.

Just sayin'.

Look, more jobs being brought to America from China by Bain!

Kip W [Muffaroo] said...

[dlauthor, I've been looking for years for a short I saw as filler on HBO. A cheery, upbeat narrator talks us through a happy, constructive day ("Rise and shine!") as a fellow magically rises from lying on his face in a parking lot and walks backwards into a roadside place where he's caught by four guys. He then repairs rips in the pool table with his cue, fixes the top of a biker chick, and magically fills somebody's beer glass ("Here's an interesting trick!" says the relentlessly happy narrator). The title was something like BACKOVER. Funny stuff, but I only got to see it once.]

rewinn said...

With cutting-edge, hot-button conservativism like this, Mallard Fillmore is sure to get some of that sweet Chinese communist money funneled through Adelson's Macau whorehouses!

Frank Stone said...

Wow -- I come home from a week at Comic-Con (where I was blissfully unaware of what was going on in "Mallard Fillmore") to find this exquisite gemstone-encrusted golden turd of a series waiting for me:

Mallard Fillmore, an unpaid flack for Fox News...

...which has made a virtual cottage industry out of doctoring news footage... complaining about NBC News doctoring news footage.

This is so rich, it HAS to be fattening.

Mallard/Brucie really is the most willfully oblivious creature in the universe, isn't he?

(By the way, I love how he only brought up the doctored-footage thing last week, and yesterday he "responded" to readers who asked if he'd made it up -- as though he had addressed it weeks ago. Interesting use of the straw man there.)

Robert Carroll said...

Bedwetting liberal soreheadism. Admittedly more entertaining than Mallard Fillmore!

dlauthor said...

Mr. Carroll, apparently, has an acute case of aphasia. I wish him well in having a toboggan grapefruit recovery.

CW in LA said...

"Mallard Fillmore, an unpaid flack for Fox News..."

And that's the really pathetic part, isn't it? I mean, Fox News, for all its many grievous faults, compensates its minions well, requiring only said minions' souls in exchange. But Brewsie, as befits an out of control boozer, gives it up for free.

It's also amusing to watch Fox News Cultists convince themselves that liberals idolize NBC - owned by that bastion of peace, love, and understanding General Electric - the same way the prostrate themselves before Blobby Uncle Roger.

Tog said...

1. Bruce Tinsley lies constantly (putting it mildly).
2. D&C regulars: "Whoa, that's some bullshit right there."
3. R. Carroll: "U MAD BRO? LOL!"

Yessir, Robbie, a winnar is you!

Stick around, we can always use a new chew toy.

Kip W [Muffaroo] said...

At least we all agree that this site is more entertaining than the object of our derision.

Toots McGee said...

Those kids at NBC and their Romney mash-ups. What a scream!

Kip W [Muffaroo] said...

Apparently, Mallard's still huffing over something from the middle of June.