What's Mallard raving about today?
Why is the supporting cast gray now? I notice the Vietnamese boy is the same complexion as Chantel.
Well, Rush has an excuse for being gray: he's Mallard little dust angel.
SUNDAY: Life sucks (#234 in a series)Truly, Mallard Fillmore is cutting edge humor, perfectly exemplifying today's "conservative" values!
Quite possibly the only consistently funny thing about "Mallard Fillmore" is that Bruce Tinsley is so obviously a proponent of something that people like him excoriate liberals for allegedly embracing: the philosophy of getting paid as much as possible for doing as little as possible.Keep livin' the dream, teat-sucker!
MIND-BLOWN-DAY...I may need to change the dose on my meds, because I keep thinking today's strip called Bill Maher an "ultra-liberal Obama supporter", and even stipulating the second, nobody who knows a damn thing about, or has even ever the hell heard of, the man would be able to call him the first with a straight face.
Oh, haven't you heard? Anyone wingnuts don't like is by definition a liberal. Ultra-liberal therefore means anyone they REALLY don't like.
Oh, look -- Mallard is a passenger on the economic relativism bandwagon (in a nutshell: "the rich" aren't really rich, and "the poor" aren't really poor. It's all relative, you see).And a simple Google search wasn't that helpful in finding the truth regarding today's subject -- it was just links to right-wing websites with headlines along the lines of "Ultra-liberal Obama-loving douchebag Bill Maher threatens to leave California over high taxes 'cuz he's a whiny little punk-ass pussy" -- so I dug a little deeper and found the relevant segment from Real Time. Not only did Maher not "threaten to leave" California, but he was pretty clearly speaking in the context of high taxes being used for excessive defense spending. Of course, Mallard and his ilk don't do context. Or nuance. Or pretty much anything that requires higher cognitive functions.
Even with that scrawl labeled "Bill Maher" I still don't see that as anywhere near looking like Maher. Instead, I just looked at the giant Jew nose that only horrible Jewish Jews have in fucking racist cartoons and sighed, "What, is he a dirty Jew, Bruce?"Aaaand apparently Maher was raised Catholic, but is half-Jewish. Apparently that half is all in the nose. Hey, Bruce, is this going to go on all week? That gives you plenty of time to show Maher drinking the blood of murdered Christian babies!Hey, Bigot Bruce! Why don't you do what your idol Thatcher just did!
Let's say, just for a second, that Bill Maher was "ultr-liberal", and had actually talked about leaving California because his taxes were too high because he's rich. (I know, I know- but strain your imaginations and pretend, okay?)He still hadn't, in the context of this strip, threatened to leave the country because his taxes were too high- just the state of California. So, all that means, if everything else posited in this strip were true, is that rich people in California pay "most of the taxes"- that is, state taxes. The "tax the rich" discussion going on right now is really about Federal taxes, which Maher would still pay just as much of if he moved to another state.What I'm saying is, Bruce is stupid.
Bill the Splut - is really one sick SOB!
Bill Maher on California Income Taxes: 'Liberals - You Could Actually Lose Me'
He drew the duck, an apple-carving person, and the same duck again. It'll be hard to forget this sterling example of industrious comic creation.
SPEWSDAYHomestuck readers will know what I mean by this: Duck ♠ TV.
MONDAY: Bill Maher is not a Republican, therefore he's an ultra-liberal *rimshot!*TUESDAY:People who don't know where Syria is are stupid!*rimshot!*P.S. Remember when Mitt Romney said Syria was Iran's route to the sea?You know, the GOP's 2012 nominee?
WHIMSDAYThat's right, Tinz. Flog that dead horse until nothing's left but four horseshoes and a huge stain on the sidewalk.
Anonymous Coward posted a link to Maher saying that the problem was spending too much on war. I think AC's point was that Maher then said taxes in California was too high and that "liberals you could lose me..." which basically proves Tinshley is wrong on the facts to call Maher liberal. The clip ALSO cuts out after the word "me" whereas Maher was plainly saying more stuff; it's typical of today's "conservatives" that they edit very selectively to give a misleading impression as to what someone really believes.WEDNESDAY:Conservatives don't like Apple coming out with new stuff; their fear of change exceeds their weak and conditional love for the free market.
weak and conditional love for the free marketWhich usually evaporates the moment said market embraces something Unfrozen Caveman Jesus wouldn't approve of.
Randy: Yeah, the clip our little buddy linked to is really the same one I had linked to earlier, only with a Newsbusters blurb attached. And just to give that dead horse one more swat: Anyone with basic language comprehension skills can easily discern that Maher's statement "you could actually lose me" was directed to "liberals", not to "California" (as in, "Liberals, you could lose me on the idea that taxing the rich at a higher rate is a good thing."). He also said, "I'm willing to pay my share", which is pretty much the opposite of "I'm so fed up with the outrageously high tax rate I'm paying here in California, I just might pack up and kiss this rotten state goodbye!" Leave it to a right-winger to link to a video clip that completely invalidates his claim as though it actually proves his claim.Oh, and today's "Mallard Fillmore" is idiotic hackwork. There -- now we're all caught up.
TURDSDAY"Yawn. That could have come from anywhere." -- Max Shreck to the Penguin
"... today's "Mallard Fillmore" is idiotic hackwork...Hey at least he's consistent!
"Apple has announced the iHack, which generates the same clip art pictures of pantless ducks with nonexistent punchlines on subjects 3 weeks out-of-date, with the occasional footnote to lying websites. It 'works' 5 minutes a day, and you have to keep feeding it welfare checks and booze. Caution is needed during thunderstorms, as it is quite the contentious lightning rod."
After all this time, Bruce is still finding ways to give new meaning to the expression "I got nothin'." That's got to count as an accomplishment in some universe or other.And I notice that he modified his depiction of the official Apple™ emblem between yesterday and today. Someone must have reminded him about the legalistic rule that once is parody, but twice is infringement. Either that or he just couldn't be bothered to draw it the same way twice.
iDAY"Oops! I remembered to tell a joke!"
iGotNuthin !(joke stolen from @ Frank Stone ... thanks Frank!)
Randy: iSeeWhatYouDidThere. :)Just remembered an Apple™ parody that was both funny and timely -- two things "Mallard Fillmore" can only hope to aspire to someday possibly become.MadTV - Apple iRack
"...funny and timely -- two things "Mallard Fillmore" can only hope to aspire to someday possibly become."I'm sorry, but I just can't object strongly enough to this statement.I don't believe Wingnut Welfare Duck has ever even aspired to be those things.
SHUDDERDAYI'm pretty sure Tinz only does these "apolitical" jokes so he'll have something to point to as apparent evidence to the contrary when people call him perfectly true and applicable names like "Republican shill" and "complete lying servant of power".Speaking of complete lying servants of power, the Hagerstown Herald-Mail (my local source for duck shit) ran a David Limbaugh column today in which the Joe Estevez of punditry refers to the Moonie Times reporting that Melissa Harris-Perry endorsed "the concept of human ownership by the state." Does anyone know what they're hideously misinterpreting to get that, or are they just completely making shit up because they know the Great Wad will just blindly trust them?
Re Saturday: Another baffling, idiotic "joke" delivered in a strip that's at least 75 percent blank space. Truly, the perfect gas-passing conclusion to this week's interminable bowel movement of a series.And to think: We lose Jonathan Winters, but "Mallard Fillmore" continues to exist. The Comedy Gods really are a sadistic gang of pricks, aren't they?
I left my Secret Wingnut Decoder Ring in my other pants (and everyone knows pants are elitist, why is why Mallard doesn't wear them). And Tinsh would never, both for personal and professional reasons, ever exercise any semblance of independent thought.So what's the right-wing beef with Apple, that Brews has been kvetching at them all week?
"...an Apple™ parody that was both funny and timely..."Mallard Fillmore is a decade-long meta-joke, on how un-funny and un-timely he can get and STILL claim to be "... one of the most highly contentious and celebrated comic strips, providing a unique conservative viewpoint to the comics pages".
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