What's Mallard raving about today?
Can't wait til he catches up to Pajama Guy. That should last him two weeks, at least.
Re Dec. 2: Behold the skewering of a cultural establishment. Or possibly the addressing of a hot-button issue. Or maybe just a pitiful waste of space.
Monthly columns. Probably not a bad idea, considering how much novelty one can find in Mallard any more. I count about five main situations:1) The duck staring at us and saying something2) Somebody else staring at us and saying something3) The duck staring while someone else says something4) Somebody else staring at us while someone says something5) Uh. Okay, four main situations.And as they are reliably drawn in the laziest way possible, it's harder and harder to extract yuks from that. Anyway, I'm usually over at the syndicate's site for the strip, where the regulars are sure to turn whatever the day's strip is into another referendum on Obamacare, or at least stand ready to tear into any non-reactionary who tries to change the subject, and to regard any differing opinion from their version of PC as a hideous breach of manners worthy of their most withering sophomore sarcasm and bellicose bluster.Some fun.
Monthly is still more frequent than Bruce's Mallard Fillmore blog.If Bruce had paid any attention to his blog, he'd see that the manufacturer of the bacon scented deodorant has been trying to get in touch with him to get some of the original artwork "promoting" his product.
"sophomore sarcasm and bellicose bluster" That'll make a duck raise his eyebrow.One of the comment regulars posted a comment on today's Funky Winkerbean depicting a going out of business store front in Funkytown, chalking the loss up to year six of the something transformation something.Oh, Funkytown may be fictional, but it's a "fiction drawn from actual documented life. Not the total fantasy of utopian expectations."We're talking Funkytown here!Oh well, those guys are great for a chuckle. Time to get on with building my Utopia.
Jan. 5 - Wait, is Brews saying he doesn't buy stuff made in China, or is he just being a dickhead?I'm gonna have to guess 'B' on this one...
Re Jan. 7: Mallard dredges up a months-old non-scandal as the basis for a "joke" that makes no sense. Who could have predicted that?
Re Jan. 10: Congratulations, Mallard -- "Mother Goose and Grimm" just did a better "selfie" joke than you. But then, just about anyone could.Now -- care to make a prediction about how long it will be before Chris Christie is forced to resign?
I'll put as much effort and originality into my comment as Brews puts into his alleged cartoon: So, for people who enjoy taking selfies, a break not a lecture, right Tinsh?
What about people who take selfies of their bangs? Doubly worth dragging on and on?
Jan. 12: Huh, mMultiple panels, an actual joke, not overtly hateful, dishonest, or ignorant - This may be the greatest Sunday Mallard in the history of Mallard!And notice how much better it was that Mallard himself was nowhere to be found.
Is this Mallard's pet fish? It probably wishes it could eat itself.
Re Jan. 13: Ooh, how clever and original -- yet another iteration of Obama's Big Lie™. Never let it be said that Mallard/Bruce isn't single-minded (not to mention simple-minded) in his quest to flagellate mouldering horse corpses.And look -- the sixth copy-pasting of the same introductory panel. Who says Bruce isn't the hardest-working cartoonist in the biz?
I see that there are lies, damned lies, and Mallard Fillmore.
Re Jan. 15: Good god -- that by you is a breakfast pastry, Bruce? It looks like a flying saucer that crashed into a giant cow patty. I guess you were just too exhausted to find a picture for reference after copy-pasting panel 1 for the eighth time, eh?And yes, we did know that you hate brown people; thanks for asking.Here's my New Year's Prediction: If Mallard ever mentions the George Washington Bridge scandal, it will only be to complain that the Lamestream Media™ didn't devote the same amount of coverage to BenghAAAAAzi.
Sunday:So, Bruce, you're a Republican who hates greed, gets paid by Rev. Moon's "pork," and a drunk driver who hates alcohol. What's your religion? Devout Hypocrisy?
Re Jan. 21: Bruce knows when Squirrel Appreciation Day is.He has apparently forgotten, however, when September 11 is.
Re Jan 22: Heh, heh. Dumb scientists. Probably the only reason people become scientists is that they are too dumb to get a real job.
Funny how Brews and the rest of the Dumb & Proud Crowd don't say a peep about climate change in July and August and September when it's 110 degrees out.
Re Jan. 22: Haw haw!! Yeh, Mallurd, cuz were smarter then all those dum sienamatists with there book lurnin! Haw haw!! LOOOzurs! Thats what it is, right Uncle Rush?
Maybe the duck and Rush can understand this, but I suspect that they are too dumb:http://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/wonkblog/wp/2014/01/06/can-global-warming-be-real-if-its-cold-in-the-u-s-um-yes/Meanwhile, if places in Alaska have had record high temperatures this past year, including January, does that mean that the duck and Rush are frauds, or don't exist?
It is +41 degrees in Fairbanks, Alaska right now. The normal high temperature at this time of year is (or once was) in the range of -20 to -10.If you don't believe the scientists, then ask the Inuits who live on the Northern coast of Alasaka, Canada, and Greenland.
I rolled my eyes at "41 degrees in Fairbanks, Alaska", but I just checked Weather Underground, and holy shit! It's 25 degrees warmer than it is right now where I live, Connecticut!I heard a coworker doing that thing more predictable than Mallard's lameness, "There's no global warming if it gets cold in the winter!" Which is like saying "I'm going to live forever because so far I haven't died." It just proves you know nothing about what you're talking about.In late December in CT, it was 60 on a Monday and 6 on Tues. YEAH THAT'S NORMAL. Pay no attention to the oil company behind the curtain!
Good lord, it's like he's not even trying anymore. It's been two weeks of the same copy paste panel, followed by some Fox News-issued Talking Points."HURR DURR Global Warming is a hoax!"Yeah, because decades worth of solid data and several thousands of scientists are all making this up so Al Gore can sell books. That's exactly it. You've exposed the conspiracy, Brews!
Ah, the War on Poverty: At long last, a war wingnuts have no interest in fighting.
Re Jan. 27-28: Oh, look -- Mallard/Bruce is concerned about poverty. He must have found out that poverty affects white people too.Now tell us how it's all Obummer's fault, ducky.
Ah, Brews' quest for a straw man so flimsy even he can knock it down continues.
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