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Saturday, February 01, 2014

February 2014

What's Mallard raving about this Month?

Read and Comment!

30 comments:

CW in LA said...

If Brews is going to flog the same deceased equine, so will I: Let's see hope how much of this he trots out in July, August, and September when it's 115 degrees out.

CW in LA said...

As always, Brews is WRONG! SEAHAWKS, F YEAH!

rewinn said...

A Beverly Hillbillies joke?
Well, not really a joke, just a failed attempt to be funny.

CW in LA said...

Pretty much figures that a right-winger would equate for-profit, fly-by-night health insurance with a romantic partner, doesn't it?

Frank Stone said...

Re Jan. 9: I'm still stuck on "regimented romance". Is Mallard actually attacking the tradition, much revered by his friends on the religious/Republican Right, of monogamous romantic (but celibate, of course!) relationships that transition into marriage? Has he been listening to Outkast's 2003 hit "Hey Ya"?

If what they say is "Nothing is forever"
Then what makes love the exception?


Is it possible that Bruce is going through a divorce? Because that would go a long way toward explaining this strip; it would mean that he's blaming Obama for the failure of his marriage, which is exactly what we would expect from him in that circumstance.

CW in LA said...

Gosh, I dunno Frank Stone, it sure is hard to imagine why a woman, let alone a liberal one like Mrs. Tinsh is said to be, would ever want to walk away from someone so obviously loving and caring as our Bwhahahahahahahah.

Almost typed that whole thing with a straight face. Well, since the gossip pages don't exactly focus on wingnut welfare hack cartoonists, it's anyone's guess if we'd ever find out if this were so.

Bill the Splut said...

This Sadly, No! article is so rambling that I don't recommend it as required reading on Our Mallardian Brucie, but here's the money quote:

"Such is the density of stupid piled upon moronity that frequently serves as humor in Bruce’s “art” that one familiar with physics might wonder why a singularity has not swallowed up the building housing their local fishwrap. The foil in his “gags” is always a straw liberal of the type that only exists in the fevered imaginings of someone who is likely to spend half a night worrying if a terrorist is lying in wait under their beds or people who mainline Megan Kelly and Fox News, though now that think about it, that Venn diagram almost certainly would be indistinguishable from a single circle."

Frank Stone said...

Re Feb. 12: The longevity of wingnut grudges continues to impress -- as does the degree of intellectual dishonesty wingnuts require in order to continue holding those grudges.

CW in LA said...

And speaking of dishonesty, Brews' timing is as brilliant as ever: Just today, Fox Nooz' own Megyn Kelly that the stuff her network claimed happen didn't actually happen:

http://mediamatters.org/blog/2014/02/12/fox-host-finally-accepts-the-truth-about-bengha/198030

FuryOfFirestorm said...

Feb 12: No surprise that Brews would purposely quote Hillary out context. When she said "what difference does it make?", she was referring to the cause behind the riots, not the deaths of 4 Americans.

Of course, the GOP is scared shitless that Hillary will run in 2016, so it's time for all the Fox News Talking Points Parrots like Brews to trot out all the other non-scandals associated with Hilary, like Whitewatergate, Vince Foster, her "secret lesbian affairs", and Bill's blowjobs.

CW in LA said...

First, Brews' doggerel really does get worse every year, doesn't it?

But man, the Tinsh sure is shining the harsh light of Truth To Power on Dennis Rodman.

The main thing, though, is that the whole Kim Jong Un throwing his uncle to the dogs story evidently originated with a satirical tweet:

http://www.sfgate.com/technology/businessinsider/article/The-Story-About-Kim-Jong-un-Having-His-Uncle-5116027.php

You know how periodically a Chinese news source will take a story in The Onion seriously and we'll all have a laugh at them? Well, I'd say Commander Truth To Power Onioned himself here, except the available evidence suggests he doesn't give a shit.

CW in LA said...

Feb. 16 - Baby carrots? Whatevs.

But really, these are my favorite Mallard strips, where it's so hard to see what the hell he's (no doubt inebriatedly) driving at that they just can't be construed as hateful or dishonest.

So, well done, Brews!

Frank Stone said...

Re Feb. 17: And how many days long are YOUR weekends, Bruce? I mean, considering how little time you obviously devote to your "job".

Kip W [Muffaroo] said...

Who knew that Abe Lincoln was a Dick Tracy villain?

Kip W [Muffaroo] said...

Obama's out to get you!
,
,
,
Because he's paranoid.
.
.
.
Wait. What?

CW in LA said...

Right, Brews. Dinesh D'ouchebag's arrest has nothing to do with his allegedly having prevailed upon others to make campaign contributions which he then reimbursed in contravention of the, whattaya call it, law.

Your party of personal responsibility, ladies and gents!

Frank Stone said...

Re Feb. 19: Since D'Souza was arrested (for, y'know, committing a CRIME) well over a year after his little movie was released, I think Bruce Tinsley should be arrested for his criminal abuse of the phrase "right after".

Maybe next Bruce can explain to us how it's Obama's fault that D'Souza cheated on his wife.

FuryOfFirestorm said...

2/19/2014: If by "right after", you actually mean "almost 2 years ago", then you would be right, Brewski.

But of course, since Obama is this evil mastermind who does not stand for dissent like the Atheist Muslim Socialist tyrant that he is, he surely wouldn't have waited almost 2 years to do something to silence D'Nesh as opposed to trying to silence him before his film made it to theaters AND home video? Right, Brews? RIGHT?

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Frank Stone said...

Re Feb. 21: Since Bruce is bringing up the IRS non-scandal as we approach tax season, I have to conclude that it's his new "Never Forget". Y'know, now that he's forgotten 9/11.

What's really pathetic is that Bruce's fans probably believe that today's strip represents an actual event.

CW in LA said...

Feb. 22 - Okay, so now Brews is admitting Nixon wasn't a paragon on awesomeness brought down by the librul media?

Looks like he's given up on trying to sell Benghazi!!1! as a scandal. And I have no idea what the fuck this "Ben Carson" alleged scandal is, but if it's a substantial as the Dinseh D'ooshbag one, we can assume it's pathetic.

The IRS thing has been well debunked, but one thing the wingnuts are happy to recycle is their lies.

Frank Stone said...

Re Feb. 22: Ah! The return of Bruce's most damning evidentiary example of all: "etc. etc. etc...."

I'm convinced!

And it turns out Ben Carson is a Fox News doctor (how's that for a postmodern absurdity?) who has been critical of Obamacare, which apparently means he's on Obama's "enemies list".

By the way, Bruce, you do know Tricky Dick was a Republican, right?

CW in LA said...

Just remember: Celebrity who uses drugs = bad; they deserve whatever terrible fate awaits them.

However:

Hack boozehound cartoonist who gets busted for drunk driving = Leave Bruce alooooooooooooonnnnnnne.

Bill the Splut said...

Tomorrow's strip:
"BENGHAAAZI.R.S.!!!!"

Kip W [Muffaroo] said...

2/25: Another rubberstamp cartoon. Politician who seems to be suffering a gas attack (and therefore must be liberal) stares at us with vapid eviltude and enunciates some variation on "I am evil and/or stupid!!!" in a thought balloon. All this in the space Charles Schulz could have carried off a small drama with a punch line.

Kip W [Muffaroo] said...

Wicked caricature of Bill Clinton today, taking 'wicked' to mean 'looks like somebody puked on a piece of paper and put glasses on it.'

CW in LA said...

Yeah, but it's clearly funny because, Bill Clinton amirite?

Frank Stone said...

Re Feb. 28: Well, if there's one thing Bruce and his dupes -- er, fans -- would know about, it's blaming one's problems on someone else.

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