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Sunday, August 11, 2013

Week of August 11, 2013

What's Mallard raving about this Week?

Read and Comment!

101 comments:

Kip W [Muffaroo] said...

SUNDAY SUNDAY SUNDAY

PULSE-POUNDING, NITRO-BURNING FUNNY CAR ACTION!
YOU'LL PAY FOR THE WHOLE SEAT
BUT YOU'LL ONLY USE THE EDGE!!


Okay, so much for trying to get a little excitement going. I kind of get the impression that continuing the strip, even in exchange for a never-empty liquor closet, has become a dreary, soul-crushing hell for Mr. Tinsley, and he's trying to strike back at it by making it every bit as lifeless as his own hollow inside.

So today it's limp antics with exclamation points, but the lifeless eyes and limp posture of every single talking bust show just how much of an apathetic pretense those are, like putting a Band-aid™ on a gangrenous leg.

This is kind of elusive to somebody searching for a point. The liberal (clearly identifiable as such by his crossed eyes and glasses) is sad because we aren't the fattest.

Typical liberal! He's clearly not doing his part here, but seems to be leaving it to the Tea Party to bring on the lipids. How much overtime at the buffet will they have to put in to make up for slacking liberals?

Kip W [Muffaroo] said...

Pity about the lack of editing function here. I think I'll just pull a Tinsley today and leave it as it is. I haven't goofed off nearly enough today.

Anonymous said...

The endless series on Fat Americans is some sort of gag, right?
DW

Tog said...

MONGO

Ha! Ha! Anthony Weiner has a big nose! Ha! Ha! Jew boy! ...CLINTON!!

Look how terrified the GOP is of Hillary, that they've already set their lapdogs a-barking! And it's still only 2013!

CW in LA said...

Yes, yes, Brews, Hillary is yet another potential presidential candidate whose qualifications are as nothing compared to those of your beloved Princess Sarah Mooseburger [rolls eyes].


vw: iourage - When I was iourage, I did a job that involved actual work...

Kip W [Muffaroo] said...

Tinsley's awareness of cause and effect seems to be on par with that of the South Seas 'cargo cultists.'

He's in good company, anyway. His party seems to think that if they can produce the outside semblance of leadership, then it doesn't matter what's under the surface — success will parachute down on them in crates.

Toots McGee said...

But Bruce and the Fox News/Dittoheads need the Clinton "legacy" of indiscretion. Without it, George W. Bush doesn't have his greatest legacy: "Restoring honor to the presidency".

Fuck You, Tinsley said...

Did Bill O'Reilly's wife try to run for president after he wrote a book a bear fucking a caged woman?

Verification Word: AssyUK, and it was pretty assy during the idiotic obsession with a whiny, inbred little brat and a representation of a horrible, crippling, White dictatorship that should have been exterminated.

Tog said...

TUEPELO

It's clearly been an ordeal for Tinsley to keep his signature anti-Semitic caricature bottled up since he was told to put Mr. Noseworthy in the box. He seems to think that if everyone dislikes the Jew in question, it's okay.

Hardly the first thing Tinsley's been incredibly wrong about.

Hey, remember when Eric Holder's conspiracy to make Zimmerman look bad was a great injustice that Tinsley wasn't going to let stand, whether it existed in reality or not?

Kip W [Muffaroo] said...

Isn't it courteous of bigots to announce themselves as such with the simple use of such phrases as "race baiters" and "race hustlers"? I guess it's gauche for them to just say "Hi. Bigot here, and I think…"

(Comment on the strip? I did that yesterday, when the idea for the week was unveiled. Now I'm commenting on MF's defenders at the syndicate site.)

Frank Stone said...

Mallard Fillmore, one of the most abysmally, willfully ignorant reactionaries imaginable... someone whose "research" consists solely of watching Fox "news" Channel and skimming the headlines of right-wing websites... is mocking "low-info voters". That's got to be about seven different kinds of ironic.

I'm sorry, Bruce -- you were saying something?

"Hey, shut up about the caricature, libtards! How are people supposed to know Anthony Weiner is a dirty Jew unless I draw him with a big, crooked hook nose?! Uh, I mean, I'M NOT RACIST, YOU ARE!!!"

Tog said...

WHEN'SITGONNAEND DEY

Even Mallard thinks Tinsley's a sick creep. But as usual, Mallard's attached far too much cosmic importance to the thumb-butt with the pencil-nub sticking out of it; it's only Tinsley that's irreparable, not society.

"fun to draw" = "JEW NOSE! JEW NOSE!"

"endless source of material" = "the rest of the world's already tired of him but JEW NOSE, EVERYBODY!!"

Kip W [Muffaroo] said...

I need some excitement. I'm going to go look at the webcam for that lab experiment with the drops of pitch that take 12 years to separate and fall off.

Bill the Splut said...

That One Thing Biden Said 6 Years Ago, and That One Thing Clinton Did 17 Years Ago: the right wing's idea of "an endless source of material." But mention the Iraq war, and "stop living in the past!"

Frank Stone said...

Bruce admits that he is just another victim of "societal decay" and not a courageous truth-teller speaking truth to power because he's courageous and truthful.

And yeah -- to someone whose repertoire consists primarily of a single "joke" (LIBURLS R DUM HUR HUR), I suppose a politician who's known for exactly one thing would seem like "an endless source of material".

Tog said...

Did Tinsley EVER do a single strip about Mark Sanford "hiking the Appalachian Trail"? ...And then not only being forgiven by the GOP but being reelected?

GOP hypocrisy is a genuine "endless source of material" yet "independent" Bruce never seems to touch upon it for some reason.

Tog said...

John Oliver, currently standing in for Tinsley Enemy #2 Jon Stewart on The Daily Show, did a wonderful bit about New York City's Stop-and-Frisk policy last night.

For the sake of white people, Oliver draws a parallel to one of Tinsley's favorite whinges, TSA frisking. Oliver also pointed out that Anthony Weiner, ironically, has proposed body cameras for cops to stop the outrageous abuses of that policy.

So let's tally up the scoring:

1. See, Bruce? The DUM LIBZ can tell an Anthony Weiner joke that is both relevant AND funny, while all you can do is draw the clicking selfie camera and JEW NOSE.

2. Tinsley has long been outraged about TSA frisking, but only because white people are subjected to it when he believes agents should concentrate on "people who LOOK like terrorists" (if you know what he means). And yet, Bloomberg's racially-unbalanced and fascistic Stop-and-Frisk policy elicited no outrage on Tinsley's part, while the big-soda ban was the subject of several Mallard strips as an attack on American freedoms.

(But Tinsley's not racist...YOU are! JEW NOSE!)

Tog said...

THURTSSOGOODDAY

Huh. I guess I was wrong! Someone pointed out to Bruce "Woohoo! JEW NOSE!" Tinsley that drawing a Jewish guy with a schnozz never seen outside Nazi propaganda wasn't the brilliant move he fancied it to be, so instead of click. and JEW NOSE! Tinsley gives us a quick scribble of what's supposed to be a burrito and tells us Taco Bell was going to market a "Carlos Danger" burrito because...uh, well, no reason.

Perhaps tomorrow's strip will have Weiner with the burrito in place of the JEW NOSE!, displaying Tinsley's usual sense of awareness and intelligence.

Falafel!

Kip W [Muffaroo] said...

I think you're getting close in the middle paragraph. It's not a burrito — it's a disembodied hook nose: 'lawyer size,' if you KNOW what he MEANS.

Who can say that isn't what it is? You can't tell from the drawings. I can just hear Tinsley muttering and whining to himself about how unfair it is that he has to draw anything other than the duck, staring back at us like an accusing abyss with a hangover.

Tog said...

HIGHDEY

Because Bruce Tinsley lacks the intestinal fortitude to provide context, I shall:

"Jim Vance, a popular NBC affiliate evening news host made the following points last year in a commentary about considering a name change, and specifically one fan who he met last year who would not even consider the change:

'His was the kind of single-minded intransigence that mirrored George Preston Marshall, that vile, evil man who once owned the team, and who swore there would never be a Negro playing on his team. Fifty years ago, because of George Preston Marshall, the Redskins [were] the last team in the entire NFL to hire a black player. Marshall wanted Bobby Mitchell, who was the player, to play not for Old D.C., but for Old Dixie.'

Fifty years later, do we really want to be the only team in the league with even a question about the appropriateness of our name? Can’t we at least talk about that, without somebody wanting to start a fight for goodness sake?”

-- NCAI (National Congress of American Indians).org

Well, Tinsley wants to start a fight, because he'll always stand up for white racism--but like any good neocon posing as a glibertarian he wants to stand up in the back where it's safe, and watch others do the actual fighting.

CW in LA said...

I thought today's strip was about St. Timmy of the Horrible Passes playing for New England?

I mean, if that's his favorite player, he should be pleasantly surprised the guy has a gig that doesn't involve asking if people would like fries with that.

Kip W [Muffaroo] said...

Mmm-mmmm Comics Kingdom comment threads. You'll come for the passive-aggressive football taunts, and within a few comments, you'll be ass-deep in OBAMACARE. Because Tinsley's not extreme enough for everybody. (My grandfather would have called him a pinko.)

Kip W [Muffaroo] said...

SATURDAY

Haw haw, every single professional athlete uses performance-enhancing drugs! Oh, the light-hearted, right-leaning frivolity of poking gentle fun at the foibles of the … he hates everybody on earth, doesn't he?

CW in LA said...

Brews seems to be using alcohol as a cartooning-enhancing drug, so I don't see what he's complaining about.

Oh, and Tinsh, didja see the stat line on your boy Timmy yesterday? 1 for 7 for -1 yards. So at least he's likely not to be employed by the Evil Patriots much longer, huh?

Anonymous said...

The Reverend Jesse Jackson, in the wake of the Trayvon Martin verdict, made this proclamation several days ago-

"I want all African Americans to know that it is time to boycott the whole state of Florida!!! No concerts, conventions or ball games. No vacations in the Sunshine State and no orange juice. Stay away from Florida. Boycott anything from Florida!"

Fox News noted that, almost instantly, the property values in Florida shot up and vacation spots began to sell out. The crime rate is expected to continue to fall to record lows until the boycott is over.

Tog said...

Awww, look. The cowardly little racist anon thinks he's being clever. Isn't that cute?

Anonymous said...

Joke of the Week:

A lawyer, a pathological liar, an Islamic-Socialist and a negro walk into a bar.

The Bartender asks - "What'll you have, Mr. President?"

Tog said...

More like "Joke for the Weak."

I'll have to link back to these "gems" the next time Tinsley claims liberals are the REAL racists.

By all means, Anonymous, proceed.

Bill the Splut said...

Copying and pasting a racist non-joke is still more work than Bruce put into his Saturday yawn. Now it's just one duck's head, Welfare King? How drunk were you? How drunk were you when you were "AnonyBruce," posting your latest gibberish here?

And if you aren't Bruce...wow. Nice life you have there, sport!

CW in LA said...

You know something else, Anonymelonfucker? You still live in country that decisively elected President Obama twice.

Suck deeply on that, you racist sack of shit.

Kip W [Muffaroo] said...

Sorry to keep reporting on the MF fan club, but I noticed an interesting thing. Tinsley blathers about teacher drones, and so what do they start screeching about?

OBAMACARE.

They're drooling like St. Bernards, and nobody even rang the little bell.

(If the strip was even marginally interesting, I'd've commented on it.)

CW in LA said...

About that strip: You'd think, if your only source of news was Drunky Duck, that there was a nationwide epidemic of children chewing their pop-tarts into guns and getting their lives ruined as a result. Truth to power?

Kip W [Muffaroo] said...

You know what the Republicans say: "If it should happen just once… then that's all we've got, and we'll run with it and repeat it endlessly."

Tog said...

I'm sure my comment there is long gone, but I noted three things:

(1) The incident Tinsley can't stop harping on happened in MAY. Bruce declared Ant Weiner to be an endless supply of material yet gave up after three or four strips (too many), but he still keeps coming back to this.

(2) The "future" of public schools? Not the present? Is Bruce turning Pinko?

(3) That hovering "drone" isn't doing anything a security camera doesn't already do. When did Tinsley go all pro-criminals on us? (Oh, right, of course, the child is white so it's different.)

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