What's Mallard raving about today?
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Friday, June 15, 2007
Thursday, June 14, 2007
Those damned lines
What's Mallard raving about today?
Cutting in line, amnesty.
If I had to guess, and unfortunately guessing is all I can do about this particular panel, I would say that Mallard just reduced the entire immigration debate to a cutting-in-line metaphor.
Cutting in line, amnesty.
If I had to guess, and unfortunately guessing is all I can do about this particular panel, I would say that Mallard just reduced the entire immigration debate to a cutting-in-line metaphor.
Wednesday, June 13, 2007
That damned ethanol
What's Mallard raving about today?
Ethanol, the Iowa caucus.
Since I have nothing rotten to say about the content of today's panel, I will criticize instead the unconvincing ethanol can, which looks like a cross between a teapot and one of those fancy dinner plate covers.
That and the fact that Mallard has drawn this rather unconvincing prop twice when, seriously, once was more than enough.
Ethanol, the Iowa caucus.
Since I have nothing rotten to say about the content of today's panel, I will criticize instead the unconvincing ethanol can, which looks like a cross between a teapot and one of those fancy dinner plate covers.
That and the fact that Mallard has drawn this rather unconvincing prop twice when, seriously, once was more than enough.
Tuesday, June 12, 2007
That damned Hugo Chavez
What's Mallard raving about today?
Hugo Chavez, the 20th century.
When I first looked at this panel, I was sure that caricature was supposed to be Al Gore.
Which led me to notice that today's panel has 4 standard Mallardisms: a bad caricature, a bad caricature with eyes closed, a bad caricature with a disturbingly lumpy index finger, ellipses with an extra dot.
Of these, that last one bugs me the most because, goddamn it, it would be so easy to fix.
Hugo Chavez, the 20th century.
When I first looked at this panel, I was sure that caricature was supposed to be Al Gore.
Which led me to notice that today's panel has 4 standard Mallardisms: a bad caricature, a bad caricature with eyes closed, a bad caricature with a disturbingly lumpy index finger, ellipses with an extra dot.
Of these, that last one bugs me the most because, goddamn it, it would be so easy to fix.
Monday, June 11, 2007
That damned Jimmy Carter
What's Mallard raving about today?
Former President Carter.
Sub-conscious things to note:
Former President Carter.
Sub-conscious things to note:
- Not even the barest hint of a defense of President Bush is offered. Instead this is simply an ad hominem attack on Jimmy Carter based entirely on Republican talking points. In other words, Mallard has illustrated the Republican playbook and published it in comic form.
- If you want to paint a man as irrelevant, why would you bring up the fact that he is a former President, a Nobel Peace Prize Winner, and allude to his work with Habitat for Humanity? When you compare that body of accomplishments to illustrating a Duck for your living, it isn't pretty.
Sunday, June 10, 2007
Those damned chickens
What's Mallard raving about today?
Dinosaurs, chickens.
Damn, have to admit, I liked today. I find the idea of snooty dinosaurs rejecting their chickenhood charming.
Tomorrow back to TV Follies? Or can we finally move on, do you think?
Dinosaurs, chickens.
Damn, have to admit, I liked today. I find the idea of snooty dinosaurs rejecting their chickenhood charming.
Tomorrow back to TV Follies? Or can we finally move on, do you think?
Saturday, June 09, 2007
Those damned debates
What's Mallard raving about today?
Debates, Reality shows.
To the Average American for whom Mallrd claims to speak, he has a message: "you suck."
Debates, Reality shows.
To the Average American for whom Mallrd claims to speak, he has a message: "you suck."
Friday, June 08, 2007
Those damned Pussycat Dolls
What's Mallard raving about today?
Deportation, TV.
So, apparently, Mallard is just working his way through the TV Guide.
If he keeps this up, I am going to take a vacation from this blog for my own sanity.
Deportation, TV.
So, apparently, Mallard is just working his way through the TV Guide.
If he keeps this up, I am going to take a vacation from this blog for my own sanity.
Thursday, June 07, 2007
Those damned Dentists
What's Mallard raving about today?
Reality TV, Celebrities, Dentists.
Remember, all over the country this sequence of reality TV panels are appearing on the editorial pages of newspapers because this is supposed to provide some sort of counter-balance to "liberal" cartoons. At this point, since it's not providing a political or ideological counter-point, I guess Mallard's job is to provide a soul-crushing lack of humor as counter-point.
It would be better if they published these panels in Psychiatric trade journals because this is a very clear cry for help.
Reality TV, Celebrities, Dentists.
Remember, all over the country this sequence of reality TV panels are appearing on the editorial pages of newspapers because this is supposed to provide some sort of counter-balance to "liberal" cartoons. At this point, since it's not providing a political or ideological counter-point, I guess Mallard's job is to provide a soul-crushing lack of humor as counter-point.
It would be better if they published these panels in Psychiatric trade journals because this is a very clear cry for help.
Wednesday, June 06, 2007
That damned forgetfulness
What's Mallard raving about today?
D-Day.
I agree, we should never forget. Never.
Like Mallard who also never forgot in 2004 but forgot in 2006 and 2005.
D-Day.
I agree, we should never forget. Never.
Like Mallard who also never forgot in 2004 but forgot in 2006 and 2005.
Tuesday, June 05, 2007
Those damned shuffleboarders
What's Mallard raving about today?
Shuffleboard, Bingo.
You know, for a duck who has spent the last 2-3 weeks complaining about TV, Mallard knows an awful lot about it. More than, say, your average blog writer who was unaware there was a TV show about Bingo.
Shuffleboard, Bingo.
You know, for a duck who has spent the last 2-3 weeks complaining about TV, Mallard knows an awful lot about it. More than, say, your average blog writer who was unaware there was a TV show about Bingo.
Monday, June 04, 2007
Those damned pears
What's Mallard raving about today?
The Network, Elitists, Pears.
You see how including that one little word, elitist, changes the entire panel?
Otherwise this would be a diatribe about just how stupid American are; those average Americans Mallard claims to champion. By including that one little word suddenly it's all the networks fault.
Brilliant!
The Network, Elitists, Pears.
You see how including that one little word, elitist, changes the entire panel?
Otherwise this would be a diatribe about just how stupid American are; those average Americans Mallard claims to champion. By including that one little word suddenly it's all the networks fault.
Brilliant!
Sunday, June 03, 2007
That damned lactose
What's Mallard raving about today?
Political Correctness, Milk, Orange Juice.
Damnit, Mallard! Why ruin a perfectly good rant about political correctness with a third-rate pun?
Political Correctness, Milk, Orange Juice.
Damnit, Mallard! Why ruin a perfectly good rant about political correctness with a third-rate pun?
Saturday, June 02, 2007
Those damned habbers
What's Mallard raving about today?
Rehab, celebrities.
Mallard rests his premise on the precarious premise that substance abuse is the exclusive domain of celebrity. In Mallard's world, average Americans do not exhibit the same tendencies towards substance abuse and rehab. Admittedly, the average American may not be able to afford Betty Ford for rehab, but the remainder of that premise is flimsy, at best.
As a side note, I admit I learned something new from Mallard: apparently the kids these days are referring to it as "habbing."
Rehab, celebrities.
Mallard rests his premise on the precarious premise that substance abuse is the exclusive domain of celebrity. In Mallard's world, average Americans do not exhibit the same tendencies towards substance abuse and rehab. Admittedly, the average American may not be able to afford Betty Ford for rehab, but the remainder of that premise is flimsy, at best.
As a side note, I admit I learned something new from Mallard: apparently the kids these days are referring to it as "habbing."
Friday, June 01, 2007
Those damned Homeschooled Kids
What's Mallard raving about today?
Reality TV, Homeschooled kids.
Ahhh, homeschooling, the answer to all life's problems.
I'm going to ignore the fact that yesterdays Mastodonal diversion appears to have been a one day stream-of-consciousness blip before going back to reality TV.
Reality TV, Homeschooled kids.
Ahhh, homeschooling, the answer to all life's problems.
I'm going to ignore the fact that yesterdays Mastodonal diversion appears to have been a one day stream-of-consciousness blip before going back to reality TV.
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