What's Mallard raving about today?
Reality TV, Celebrities, Dentists.
Remember, all over the country this sequence of reality TV panels are appearing on the editorial pages of newspapers because this is supposed to provide some sort of counter-balance to "liberal" cartoons. At this point, since it's not providing a political or ideological counter-point, I guess Mallard's job is to provide a soul-crushing lack of humor as counter-point.
It would be better if they published these panels in Psychiatric trade journals because this is a very clear cry for help.