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Wednesday, June 15, 2011

That damned Phenomenon

What's Mallard raving about today?

Television, Oprah Winfrey

Seriously? Mallard Fillmore is criticizing people for watching too much TV? Do I really need to count the number of panels so far this year in which he's been plopped in front of the TV?

Not to mention...you missed the whole Oprah phenomenon? That doesn't mean you don't watch daytime TV; it means you live with your head up your ass.

And finally, what an elitist jerk.

Tuesday, June 14, 2011

That damned Time

What's Mallard raving about today?

Oprah, Reading

Yeah, I have no idea what this is about, except to say that Mallard is a smug Elitist.

An Elitists who can't really write a coherent sentence, but...

Monday, June 13, 2011

That damned Debate

What's Mallard raving about today?

Republican Debate, Reality TV

In fairness, Mallard, the people appearing on The Bachelorette are less bat-shit insane than those appearing in the Republican debate.

Which, I suppose, would be a reason to prefer the Republican Primary as your viewing pleasure if it were a reality TV show, except that it's far too mean-spirited towards average Americans and turns off viewers.

On an unrelated note, good luck in 2012!

Sunday, June 12, 2011

That damned Live-Tweet

What's Mallard raving about today?

Twitter

Isn't that cute, Mallard is trying to appear relevant in Modern society.

Saturday, June 11, 2011

Those Damned Nazis

What's Mallard raving about today?

Nazis, Democrats

A Google search to attempt to figure out what Mallard is referring to yields links to articles about a Republican Representative publicly making a Gestapo reference regarding Education reform.

Further down the page, you can also find that a Republican claims a teacher sent him an Email similarly comparing Education reform to the Holocaust.

Republican representative making a public statement vs. an Email from a teacher.

Those Liberals have no shame!

Friday, June 10, 2011

What's Mallard raving about today?

GOP Candidates, Racism, The Media

Mallard, it's a lovely persecution complex you have going here. Part of the grievance-based ideology, I understand.

But here's my challenge to you: List specific incidents in which a GOP candidate said something that was decried in a mainstream media source as racist code or being dog whistle politics, and let's analyze what was said and see if the answer is for the media to stop decrying harmless things as racism or maybe, just maybe, the answer is for GOP candidates to stop saying things that are racist in nature.

I'm willing to take my chances on which of those proves to be true.

Unfortunately such a challenge is doomed from the start, since the usual standard for analysis is whether a reasonable person would find it racist. Mallard will, of course, insist he is a proxy for all reasonableness, and doesn't find the phrase "food stamp President" racist in any way: "What could possibly be racist about that? There are white people on food stamps. And some of my best friends are black."

Thursday, June 09, 2011

That damned Code

What's Mallard raving about today?

GOP Candidates, Elections, The Media.

Mallard Fillmore breaks open a major case! How can everyone not be talking about this?

I mean it's not like GOP candidates are calling President Obama a "food stamp President" or anything like that!

Wednesday, June 08, 2011

That damned Show

What's Mallard raving about today?

Reality T.V.

Hey, Mallard, are you talking to the same people who need a break, not a lecture? Because, you know, your ongoing diatribe against Reality TV sounds to me like a self-superior lecture.

Plus, why do you hate the Free Market?

Tuesday, June 07, 2011

That damned Week

What's Mallard raving about today?

Hats

No. But I have something against heavy-lidded leering from dead-eyed waterfowl.

Monday, June 06, 2011

That damned Longing

What's Mallard raving about today?

Donald Trump, The Media.

Don't fret, Mallard. They're busy chasing Anthony Weiner's weiner.

Sunday, June 05, 2011

Those damned Rankings

What's Mallard Fillmore raving about today?

Education

The fact that any school anywhere invited Mallard Fillmore to give their commencement address pretty much explains those other statistics.

It's important also not to mention the fact that Republicans have been largely in charge of government during this slide. Because, clearly, this is all the Democrat's fault.

Saturday, June 04, 2011

That damned Tweet

What's Mallard raving about today?

Social Media, Republican Presidential nominees.

Hey, GOP. When a lickspittle like Mallard Fillmore thinks your candidates are lame, you're in real trouble. Real. Trouble.

If you actually care about the deficit, how about just admitting you're going to get your ass handed to you and donate all your campaign funds to deficit reduction instead?

Thursday, June 02, 2011

That damned Guy

What's Mallard raving about today?

Commercials

First off, Mallard...turn off the TV. We have no idea what you are talking about.

Second, why do you hate the Free Market?

Third, you've been a lick spittle for the Insurance industry since President Obama took office...do your corporate masters know you're criticizing them now?

Wednesday, June 01, 2011

What's Mallard raving about today?

Osama, President Obama, Hillary Clinton

Wow, OK...really? This is the best you got?

Well, at least with this feeble effort, Mallard is admitting that President Obama is going to be re-elected, if his biggest worry is the non-existent possibility of a challenge from Hillary Clinton.