What's Mallard raving about today?
Q: Why can't Batshit simply cite Consumer Reports with his asterisk? They have a website, I've heard.A: BRUCE TINSLEY DOES NOT ACCEPT MONEY TO FLOG CNN, GLENN BECK, OR ANYTHING ELSE! YOU'D BE RACIST FOR EVEN SUGGESTING THAT! BUT RACISM DOESN'T EXIST!! WHITE PEOPLE SAY SO!!Kudos, Mister Tinsley, for having your ass handed to you by none other than Scott Adams just a few strips over.
Consumer Reports watches "CNN Tech" to get their information? Well that's a shot to CR's credibility.I have to give Tinsley some small credit for surprising me. At first I was convinced that he was airing another petty grievance (although the set up grievance is slightly more weighty than the Mallard average), but then he switched it up and made it another tone deaf "racism is dead" gag. I guess that means the joke worked?
Not only did he pointlessly cite someone citing someone, but he immediately followed it up with a citation-free "other reports," which I prefer to interpret as "after nine beers, it gets pretty hard to work an Iphone case. Or a ruler, for that matter."
More adjectives, duck!Remember that your target audience is idiots, and they won't know you're kidding until you've larded at least four smarmy, sarcastic, obvious, cliché adjectives there. (See what I just did? Ho ho!)
Wait, wouldn't the joke be that people believe that black iPads are bigger than white ones?Speaking of which, How many strips (well, panels, really- it's not a comic "strip" without actual sequential art) are we going to have to endure 4-6 weeks from now about the Rep. Weiner situation?Verification- egadal: what Sen. Franken's British cousin said after reading Mallard for the first time.
The New York Times? Mallard Fillmore is the preeminent source for reporting how whites keep getting screwed over.
Could Tinshley be so ashamed of mocking the idea that racism still exists that he sabotages his "comic" with literally twice as many words as the "joke" requires?A competent writer would try something like: "The white Iphone4 is 2 millimeters thicker than the black one, leading the New York Times to decry this color-based inequality in our bitterly divided nation."OK, it's a stupid joke, and the underlying concepts are that racism is not a problem, people complain about racism too much, and the NYT is way way liberal - all of which are wrong. But it's a recognizable joke, and there's nothing really wrong with poking fun at the NYT now and then; and one of the funniest person I know is a professional diversity advocate who explicitly mocks the idea of picking people for projects just to "check the diversity box on your checklist" (as opposed to finding functional advantages that persons of diversity can bring to a project).So why can't conservatives write funny comics? Is it that whole political-correctness thing - the need for ideology trumps any need for quality?
Mallard Fillmore: NOT bitter and mean-spirited.
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