Project Wonderful Banner

Friday, December 21, 2007

That damned TP

What's Mallard raving about today?

Toilet paper.

Frankly, I'm speechless.

Although it does prompt me to point out that Mallard hasn't had any occasion to either say or avoid saying "Christmas" this week, making his Monday installment all the more puzzling.


exanonymous said...

Right. Toilet paper. For picky people. The connection is so obvious!

Methinks someone was spending too much time leaning over the toilet when he had to come up with an idea for a strip due.

factinista said...

I think that what Mallard was referring to on Monday was that he's now calling them "Great-Gift Ideas" (hyphen included) instead of "Christmas Gift Ideas."

And if Tinsley is stretching so much for more gift ideas, why doesn't he just move on to another subject?

BillyWitchDoctor said...

The sort of "leaning over the toilet" that Tinny engages in requires more mouthwash than bumwipe.

You know, I can totally believe Tinny would hand out toilet paper as a Christmas gift.

And it is a great idea for a gift--with some additional details. I just can't decide if I'd rather scrub my pincher with Mallard's face, Tinny's mugshot, or the cast of "The George W. And The Other Dick Circus."

ktjce said...

Okay I very nearly yelled this, in my parent's house, at the computer screen. But it is the only sane response.


Anonymous said...

This isn't really related to this mallard fillmore, but I decided to check out that MRC thing he mentioned just for shit and giggles. And on their blog, newsbusters, they have their comedy show "newsbusted." Normally I like lookig at things like this or conservapedia to see the hilarious positions conservatives have. But newsbusted is perhaps the most hate-filled thing I have ever seen. If you can stomach it, the link is here.

exanonymous said...

BWD, exactly. You'd only think toilet paper would make a great gift if you're leaning over next to it and not using it.

Mouthwash would then be for the smart intelligent common-sense toting conservatives, and therefore wouldn't be a sarcastic present.

Dave Robidenza said...

For starters, "picky people" are going to be picky about their toilet paper, don't you think? They're going to want the fancy, soft as silk, lotion-soaked brand while I imagine Mallard would be handing out the ass-ripping rough kind you find in public toilets.

And what is up with the overuse of hyphens? You'd only use a hyphen if there was a risk of misreading, which isn't the case in "great gift idea" and certainly not in "gift idea.

connection said...

that's the shittiest gift idea evar