What's Mallard raving about this week?
Hillary Clinton.
Oh, man, it's going to be a long stretch between now and Hallowe'en, with Mallard baselessly asserting that people are "scary" just because he says they are. And yet, President Bush and Vice President Cheney, whose popularity actually qualifies them as scary, will never appear.
Also, caricatures. Lots and lots of bad caricatures.
At least in today's panel Mallard mistakenly manages to indict The Media for their tiny-minded participation in right-wing ad hominem attacks on Hillary's laugh.
12 comments:
Sorry, but what the fuck is Mallard supposed to be dressed as here? I wanna say Willy Wonka, but the colors are all wrong.
It's funny how small minded it makes Mallard look (though, are the glasses supposed to make him appear intelligent? HA)
SCAREY!
Women run for office!
We need those pasty fat white guys who look like they rise from the dead to run our country, because they aren't SCAREY! Women are like, scarey!
She'll be all PMS-y and declare war! And then she'll hand us over to terrorists! Smart women SCARE MEEEEEE!
I go vote republican now.
Giving credit where credit is due: As Captain Slack noted in the comments the other day, Tinshley doesn't resort to using "Democrat" as an adjective.
Sure enough, Tinshley says "Democratic candidate" in today's comic. Pretty much every other right-winger would have said "Democrat candidate."
Uh, that should be "Democratic nominee"/"Democrat nominee." Same basic point.
So...Mallard's dressed as...a clown? Or George Will? George Will as a clown? Oh wait, that's...oh, you know this punchline.
George W. Bush Version: "Gimme candy! Gimme gimme gimme! Gimme candy or I'll send your kids to Haditha (or Gitmo)!"
Dick Cheney: "Gimme your g****** candy or I'll blow your ****ing face off! Now apologize!"
Man, this is too easy.
Bruce Tinsley version:
"I hate teachers! Gimme scotch! BLEEAAARRRRGH *runs into tree, passes out*"
The Larry Craig/Ted Haggard version:
He stands there and lectures you about the wickedness of sugar and the immorality of candy, and while you're distracted by his santimonious speech, he surrepitously is shoveling the contents ofyour candy bowl into his pillowcase.
Sorry for the tortured metaphor. Shoulda left it to a professional.
I have to admit that I jumped a little bit this morning when I saw Tinsley's horrible caricature. Yep, that really was scary on a number of levels. Too bad none of them were intentional.
Rush Limbaugh Version: "Gimme the (huff) contents of your (gasp) medicine cabinet! (pant) Hey, kid! Your voice (gasp) sounds funny! Haw! (wheeze) Haw!"
Of course, his cyst-riden ass would be hardpacked into his favorite G.I. Joe outfit...
What r u poeple talking about this was a funny comic! The duck is funny he tels you dirty librels the TRUTH and you cant handel it! You cant handle TRUTH and you dont face FACTS! The TRUTH and FACTS are that Hillery is a dirty Librel who is ugly and has a werdo luagh!
Dont hastle the duck the Mallerd Fillmore = funny you all must be just JEALOUS!!
This is how sad it's become: it's impossible to tell whether King Awesome Dawg Man's illiterate ravings are satirical, or serious.
@Billy:
Poe's Law applies to politics as well as religion.
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