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Wednesday, October 31, 2007

That damned Constitution

What's Mallard raving about today?

U.S. Students, U.S. Constitution.

This year my costume is something really scary...the Bush Administration's trampling of the U.S. Constitution.


exanonymous said...

He didn't trample it! You just never read it right:

Me the People of the United States, in Order to form a more perfect Corporation, establish Torture, insure international Hostility, provide for the defence against commoners, promote the general Warfare, and secure the Blessings of Security to myself and my Posterity, do ordain and establish this Constitution for the United States of Bushica.

It feels kind of bad to make a mockery of such a great piece of work, but for some reason there are certain folks in office who don't even feel guilty about SLAUGHTERING the entire intent behind it.

BillyWitchDoctor said...

Exanonymous: Too true. My Sunday paper's opinion section carried arguments for "overhauling" the Constitution, and the "ask the public" column quizzed people on the street about what they would change. (Thankfully, most published responses were concerned about outlawing torture--but I'm sure Tinny would dismiss that as liberal bias on the paper's part.)

Okay, I give up, Tinny. Exactly what parts of the Constitution are little kids Rush's age so ignorant of, and why is that so important that it moves you to pitch a rant? (I don't see an asterisk this time, so I also wonder how you came to this knowledge, other than simply making it up out of preconceived notions and alcohol fumes. Research? Your idea of "research" is watching FOXNews.)

Tinny, you dork, there are grown-ups (for lack of a better word) in charge of important matters who don't know what the Constitution says...or simply consider it a "quaint document" without real meaning. You're a fan of such men, as I recall. How's that working out? Does that document mean anything to a "decider" who only wants to prove he's still "relevant?"

This was an unusually idiotic strip, even by Tinsley standards. The point is pointless, the "joke" is nonsense, and the thought of Rush quizzing and lecturing everyone who crosses his path that night...that's just painfully lame.

Michael said...

Rush, maybe you should be concerned about U.S. adults' ignorance of the Constitution. For example, did you know that it's an explicitly secular document? And that it claims everyone has a right to a "speedy and public trial"?

connection said...

this is just more of the cognitive dissonance from tinsley. he'll talk about how none of the young people know about the constitution then the next week he might think something like "Well as long as they save me from the Muslims I don't care who they torture. i didn't do anything wrong so they can wiretap phones without warrants." I've heard people say that on CSPANs Washington Journal. scary stuff for America.

Scanman said...

Rush is just too lazy to actually make an effort, just like his namesake. And his creator.

Matt Ramone said...

Part of me is relieved, due to the fact that I was fully expected a whole week of offensive racial politics poorly disguised as "libruls are the troo bigots!"

On the other hand, what the hell? As has been said by many others, the modern right leaders and figureheads wouldn't recognize the Constitution if it came into their room at night and started humping them. Yanno, they chided Bill Clinton for his waffling definitions, but when your nominee for goddamnded Attorney General can't say either way if waterboarding is torture, then you need to get smacked on the nose with a rolled up copy of the Bill of Rights while someone yells "NO!" at you over and over.

Kaitlyn said...

I had to memorize and recite the Preamble of the Constitution in 8th grade.

No, I don't remember any of it.

I do know that Detective Green violated this guy's 4th amendment rights by putting a toothpick in the door's lock so the suspect couldn't get in before the warrant arrived. (They found the security tapes of the guy killing 4 people.)

Ah, knowledge.

Bruce's Mom said...

When he was little, Bruce wore this very costume to a Halloween party. I warned him not to, but he wouldn't listen and called me a dirty Liberal sympathizer. The party didn't go well. Most parties didn't go well for little Brucey.

factinista said...

Even if people didn't know what the Constitution looked like, any moron could tell that's a grocery ad.

Michael said...

Rush is totally fucking with Mallard. He's obviously dressed as a homeless person.

NW said...

Nelson Muntz: What is that supposed to be?

Rush: It's American kids' ignorance of the constitution.

Nelson: You're dad and namesake voted for a guy who's ignorant of the constitution. (Punches Rush in the gut, leaving him withering in pain.) Ha-ha!

Anonymous said...

Me, I'm always frothed with rage whenever 3rd grades can't tell me what the 4th Amendment is about. And god help them if they can't name the order in which the three branches of government are laid out.

Hey, why does someone who so plainly and vocally hates the Federal Government always bitch on that kids don't know Constitutional stuff?