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Saturday, August 22, 2009

Those damned packages

What's Mallard raving about today?

The Post Office, The Economy.

Worst Economy since the Great Depression...yeah, I know.

Health Insurance system is broken and we need to fix it...yeah, I know.

Two wars still going on...yeah, I know.

You know what really chaps my hide, though? The Post Office.

And Airline food.

Am I right, or what?


CW in LA said...

It's been years since I've had any problems with the post office.

Maybe Tinshley's packages just get beat up because he's a dick to his mail carriers & local post office staff.

Michael said...

Ba-dum, ching!

This recession sure is hilarious, isn't it?

Michael said...

The USPS doesn't actually beat up Tinsley's packages; he just doesn't remember when he uses one as a pillow while sleeping in his front lawn again.

wv: scershr: The sound one makes when woken up by the sunrise, realizing you're lying on grass.

GeoX said...

Is this one of those brilliant "SEE HOW HORRIBLE THE POSTAL SERVICE IS NOW IMAGINE IF HEALTHCARE WERE LIKE THAT HUR HUR HUR" things? One of those things that are completely nonsensical because USPS is actually pretty impressive?

Anonymous said...

Damn that Post Office and its amazing efficiency!

Damn it straight to Hell!

(goes to Town Hall meeting, screams incomprehensibly for three quarters of an hour, pats self heartily on back)

Iron Dragon said...

I haven't had any packages I sent through the post office end up battered or damaged. Then again I also make sure to put padding on possibly fragile objects and make sure that I use an appropriately sized container for whatever I send. I don't know, maybe Indiana has a lot of trouble or something in that vein since that's where Tinsely lives if memory serves.

The interesting thing is that as annoyed as he gets at the public sector stuff private can be just as bad. I don't use FEDEX unless I have to these days because I've had book deliveries never show up and had to battle with them on the phone for hours before I finally managed to get what I ordered.

HT said...

This seems like some weird non sequitur that a lot of Republicans seems to pull up out of nowhere during the healthcare debate.

"Look, for the umpteenth time, the reform isn't sodomize your grandmother's abortions, now please, if you'd listen I-"

"The post office isn't doing very well."


I guess they are trying to point out that government run programs end up doing terribly, but for the love Athe, when did anyone complain about postal service outside of crazed postmen and bad comedians until just now? A privatized mail service would be a HORRIBLE idea even if you could make this a somewhat decent connection between the these two issues.


HT said...

Rather, privatized ONLY mail service. I am not paying $8 more to get something 2-3 days instead of 6-8. I have had more issues with Fex-Ex "missing" me because the carrier lightly rapped on the door once and gave up after than from getting package two days later than going express delivery.

Tog said...

It's almost as if Tin realized how completely indefensible his "let's kill your grandma" and "conversation with a liberal" strips were, and quickly stepped back from the edge with this weak stuff. But I'm pretty sure I'm giving him way too much credit in that respect.

Here's a tip from someone with a little experience, Tin: most mail loss and damage occurs at the hands of airlines which are contracted to ship packages, not from USPS employees.

...Not that you'll ever let fact get in the way of a stale "joke."

Get a real job, creep.

Nick said...

Well, sure, when the only packaging you use is in empty Jim Beam cartons filled with Bud empties for padding.

WV: billw. As in "Friend of." Seriously, that's the WV.

NLC said...

I wish I could remember who said this originally, so I could give due credit, but the best take on the post office/health care comparison I ever heard was [quote approx]:

"Each time someone asks me 'Do you really want the same people in charge of the health care system who are currently in charge the post office??' I can only respond 'You mean a system where I can put a stamp on an envelope and put it in a box in Tampa, Florida and a couple days later it shows up in a box on my sister's porch in Fairbanks, Alaska? Hell yeah! I'd love to live under a health care system that worked like that.

Executive summary: Whenever Tinsley or one of his ilk start complaining about the Post Office, you can assume that they are out of ideas and safely just stop listening.

Ducky is Right said...

NCL, I think Lewis Black.

Ducky has serious issues with 'badmouthing service providers I deal with constantly, then wondering why the service I receive is always so lousy.'

Where I live now, on the ten-mile drive to school, I pass no fewer then two post offices. Where I moved from, I can think of about three offices that were a ten minute drive from my house.
The Post office is one of the most impressive and useful things in existence. You see, Ducky, in grown-up land, you sometimes have you pay for things simply because they're useful, even if they're not really fun. I don't like having to PAY for laundry detergent, but I understand why I have to.

Ducky is Right said...

Whoa, character limit.

When I worked at UPS (ZOMG PRIVATE INDUSTRY SO MUCH BETTER!!) there was a section of the building whose entire job it was to try and salvage, or send back, damaged packages. 90% of the time, a "damaged" was something that was packed piss poorly. I once got a "damaged" that was a few planes of glass wrapped in brown paper. No padding or protection of any kind.

Rule 1 of shipping: Never ship anything that is not replaceable. Never.

Also, Ducky is stupid.

s said...

Tinsley awaits silent Trystero's empire.

(cf. The Crying of Lot 49, Thomas Pynchon)

Anonymous said...

Tinsley is right, nothing the gov'ment does is wortha damn....wait....what's that?....The postman is here with my social security, gotta go, lotto awaits.

GeoX said...

No hallowed skein of stars can ward, I trow,
Tinsley, who's set his tryst with Trystero.

rewinn said...

Since the USPS was privatized back in the 1970s and gets no taxpayer subsidy, it must cut unprofitable locations due to a fall in market demand, like any other good capitalist enterprise.

If Tinkley wants more post office locations based not on supply-and-demand but on the Will of the People and funded through government, he's arguing for socialism. Fine by me but why does he lack the guts to say so?

P.S. In my business, I mail 10-20 packages a day, around 5 thousand a year. The last time a customer complained about a damaged package was 2005 (I had not been using rigid packaging at that time.)

Anonymous said...

BT is jabbing the U.S. Postal Service because of the statement made by Obama. Obama on Health Care being like Post Office, Private Insurance like UPS and FedEx.

What he admitted but I do not believe he realized at the time, is that the government cannot run any program as well as the private sector. I must exclude the armed forces.

GeoX said...

What he admitted but I do not believe he realized at the time, is that the government cannot run any program as well as the private sector. I must exclude the armed forces.

Okay, but really, now--I guess I should be used to it by now, but how is it possible for an actually human being to make a statement this stupid and not experience immediate cranial combustion? Sure you're not some sort of artificial semi-intelligence, troll?

CW in LA said...

If the private sector is so gosh-darn wonderful, why is Anonytroll excluding the armed forces?

Just wondering, how many moon landings has the private sector carried out?

Anonymous said...

Postal Union Responds to Obama's Comments

Tog said...

Anony-numbnut is trying to pretend that Tin hasn't been whining about the USPS for years now, when in fact some variant of the stupid DANG POST OFFIS BRAKES MAH BOXIS bit has appeared in the strip at least once every six months or so.

Anon, whenever you dance around squealing and urinating uncontrollably because Obama said something stupid (something I'm fairly certain you accomplish with far greater frequency), always remember George W. Bush on his hands and knees under the Oval Office furniture, laughing and yelling, "Nope, no WMDs here!!" at a video camera.

rewinn said...

Anonymous Coward is simply lying about what Obama said, which is kinda funny considering his link is to a video of it.

That's o.k. A man too frightened to stand behind his words is not saying anything we need pay any mind to.

Meanwhile, the government-run health care system in Finland delivers better results at lower cost than does our current system here in the USA. Why does Anonymous Coward think we can't do as well as Finland?

rewinn said...


Does it cost MORE or LESS to ship Tinkley's book of Mallard Fillmore cartoons by UPS than by USPS?

USPS Media Mail is $2.38 for 1 pounds, $2.77 for 2 pounds.

It costs EXACTLY THE SAME ... because NO-ONE WANTS a book of Mallard Fillmore cartoons!

Anonymous said...

Rewinn said...
"Meanwhile, the government-run health care system in Finland delivers better results at lower cost than does our current system here in the USA. Why does Anonymous Coward think we can't do as well as Finland?"

Another brilliant statement from the Duck and Cover, "irregular" regular.

Think, just think. Finland has less than 6 million people in their country. The United States population is approximately 305 million. As far as you are concerned this could have no bearing on the management of health care? It is not easier to provide quality care to a country with less than 6 million vs. one with 305 million?

I would suggest you move to Finland and take approximately 5 million of your fellow liberal thinkers with you.

GeoX said...

Democrats are OUT of power: "Why don't you LEAVE if you don't like it, LIBRULS?!?"

Democrats are IN power: "Why don't you LEAVE if you don't like it, LIBRULS?!?"

The sense of entitlement would be hilarious if it weren't so grotesque.

exanonymous said...

Oddly enough,

packages from private companies get beaten up or delayed too.

I'm just saying.

Incidentally, it is more expensive to mail with the private company.

exanonymous said...

By the way, the homogeneity and small population have some bearing on Finland's success, but it isn't the entire story.

Finland also has a low level of corruption on all levels. They continue to keep this by allowing all citizens access to a full education and health care regardless of income. It allows for a larger pool which in turn creates healthier competition, which is remarkably similar to the idealized free market principle of competition and personal innovation allowing people to seek out and chose the best possible.

And Mallard's peeve of grade inflation? Doesn't really happen as much when money is not involved and there's no shortage of qualified students.

Tog said...

Here's a shining example of UPS (not USPS) in "action" from another, far superior, comic-strip artist. Please note the reaction in the comments.