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Friday, February 04, 2011

That damned Response

What's Mallard raving about today?

Unemployment.

Mallard is not capable of applying for jobs and responding to job postings at the same time.

And he wonders why he is still unemployed.

And hates Public Sector Employees, but that's kind of a tangent, really.

18 comments:

Tog said...

For all of Batshit's foaming at the mouth about government bureaucrats, this guy is being very patient with Mallard's incompetence. More than I'd ever be, that's for sure.

Faster, Harder, More Challenging GeoX said...

Oh, so now Mallard is all get-up-and-go about finding work, after having spend however many months collapsed on the sofa blearily watching TV he hates? Right, then.

dlauthor said...

Mr. Tinshley, you're only supposed to drink at most three beers an hour, not forty in one hour and then pass out the next!

Seriously, Bruce, we know that the concept of moderating your intake gives you the hives. You don't have to be coy about calling it "job applications" or "research" any more. Just admit you have a problem!

Kip W said...

The duck's upset because that one position, "Hater Wanted" was filled up right away, and they wouldn't even consider him because he was a duck. Where's all the damn tolerance we're supposed to have? It's all because of the stupid liberals.

Rootbeer said...

You mean one of the qualities that employers look for in a potential hire ISN'T severe manic-depressive disorder?

Also, haha, like there are 40 different companies left in Mallard's industry for him to apply to anymore.

David in NYC said...

He wants a job "right away", and has concluded the best approach is to stop sending out résumés? Huh? He may be even dumber than we think he is.

WV: hiptin. No, he isn't.

Rootbeer said...

Duck spent a whole hour on each job application he sent out last week. When I'm applying for a job, I spend that much time alone on reading the company's website familiarizing myself with their corporate voice and looking for hints about their work culture.

All the other tasks -- scanning the job posting for important keywords; customizing my resume; conceiving, drafting, revising, and finalizing a personalized cover letter; filling out and submitting an application form -- they all require extra time on top of that.

A competent white-collar job seeker, doing it fulltime, might submit 10 good job applications per week, a dozen tops. Forty really is way too many.

Anonymous said...

Sorry that this is a day too late, but here is a much better take on Baby Boomers:

http://www.salon.com/entertainment/comics/this_modern_world/1998/01/12tomo.html

JBC

Frank Stone said...

Um... what?

So... public sector employees pace themselves... but private sector employees... don't?

Um... what?

Steve-O said...

Let's ignore the first bit of idiocy in this "comic" and focus on the jab at public sector employees. If Mallard really hates public sector employees so much he should move to Somalia. In the Libertarian paradise of Somalia one could go months without encountering a public sector employee. I am willing to chip in for a one-way ticket for Bruce Tinsley. I'm pretty sure he's mailing it in on these "comics" anyway, what difference would location make?

rewinn said...

Mallard's claim that he is spending 40 hours responding to callbacks from his employment applications is obviously a lie.

Maybe in a country where 4 million unemployed are persuing 40 million job openings that might possibly be true, but not in today's America. The clerk is being very nice to Dishonest Duck but then most service workers are.

And ... of course the messages here are plain: government workers are lazy, and people who don't have jobs just didn't send out enough resumes.

BTW ... an intelligent person doesn't exhaust his store of 40 potential openings all at once. Every time you apply for a gig, you learn something about the industry, yourself, the competition ... interviews are GREAT sources of information! Your 3rd week of job hunting should be MUCH more effective than your 1st week, because you've learned a lot. And that indeed is because you're "paced yourself" ... learned to run a marathon, not a sprint.

But that would require "learning" which is impossible for a Know-It-All.

One thing that reichwingers like Tinshley, Beck and Rush have in common: they don't NEED to learn, because they already know everything.

Marion Delgado said...

In all honesty, the last time I got a job - in a boom, not a recession - I did way more than 40 applications a week. And yeah, responding and filling out were coterminous.

The only true part of this is that public sector stuff is a combination of applying, networking, meeting certain tick-offs inherently (minority and disability hire), and (and this takes time) ticking off other things on your resume. Once friends of mine got their first public sector job, and learned the system, they would use their free time basically checking off requirements - doing volunteering or taking courses as required.

And being very careful to keep their network of acquaintances friendly. That said, that's a sort of competence that's not out of place in management in the corporate world, the pay is much lower and the workload can be just as great.

Since this is not funny, I will add:

Gummint! AmIRite? Haw haw haw haw!

Comedy Gold!

Bill the Splut said...

Written by someone who has obviously never applied for a job. He probably sent one crappy strip to Murdoch and was hired as wingnut welfare on the spot.

Is he giving any thought as to how this stuff is playing to his readers who are jobless? (No.)

Ducky is Right said...

Wait, Mallard is trying to get on the dole for unemployment? What an entitled, socialist, welfare queen!

That's funny, Tins thinks private sector employees never drag things out. It's cute, like when children try to explain to adults how the tooth fairy works.

rewinn said...

"...Tins thinks private sector employees never drag things out..."

I remember working for a firm that billed clients hourly, for my time doing something that I figured out how to do about twice as fast. My supervisor didn't appreciate me showing how our company could make less money.

Another time I was working for a client who was certain his friend had invented a "fifth normal form database". His company sanks a skazillion bucks into making it work; my job was to put together a GUI to be attached to the database engine. My team knew that the db engine would never be ready since there's no such thing as fifth normal form, but everyone gave up on trying to pursuade the pointy-haired bosses of this. It was kinda funny in a way, but it enabled me to spend a lot of time studying GUI design (which was definitely "pacing myself).

EnoRed said...

Apparently Tinsley has never heard of "quality over quantity".

But then why would he when he has to churn out one of these stinkers every day?

Neo Tuxedo said...

Written by someone who has obviously never applied for a job. He verifiably sent one crappy strip to Rev. Moon and was hired as wingnut welfare on the spot.

Fixed that for you, Bill.

WV: entiken, shorthand for "the entities from beyond human perception that Tinsley can see when he's had enough research". (When FF died out from under me last night as I was making my first try at posting this comment, the WV was, my hand to Elvis, "pundityp".)

Erich said...

"I want a job right away!"

That statement would have a little more weight if you'd done this strip back in November, right after Mallard lost his job...