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Saturday, September 22, 2007

That damned Stream-of-Consciousness

What's Mallard raving about today?

Baggy pants.

8 days ago, Mallard began discussing this topic and followed that thread for 2 days.

That train of thought was interrupted by the sudden need to criticize television, which lasted for one day.

Then he spent 2 days defending Larry Craig, which at least would have counted as breaking news, though of course with the delay in publishing it's old news.

Then, he followed the urge to criticize Hilary Clinton and the wives of other candidates for reasons passing understanding, an urge which lasted 2 whole days.

After which he needed to publish a panel which would coincide with the end of summer, because the joke was just too hilarious to pass up.

Then, and only then, did he manage to return to the topic of baggy pants.

It's like reading Ulysses, for Christ's sake, if Ulysses had been written by a bitter, incoherent, and manic Duck, of course.


Truce Binsley said...

Wasn't there some speculation that Tinshley creates the strips in the logical order, but they get jumbled when he drunkenly gathers them together to send to his publisher? The evidence is overwhelming.

And the baggy-pants boy is still shirtless!

BillyWitchDoctor said...

"Atlanta's great baggy-droopy-pants-wearing debate....*"


I'll leave alone the fact that Tinny doesn't even know what to call the, um, "fashion" (snort); if there's a "great debate" about this in Atlanta or anywhere else, Tinny, I'd appreciate the little asterisk. You know, something to let us know you aren't just pulling it out of your ass wholesale.

God--even when we agree that something's stupid, Tinny still can't avoid making himself seem even more moronic by comparison.

Next week: Mallard takes on The Unholy Terror Of...Plumber's Crack! (Only to be interrupted by a rage-rant about protests in support of the Jena 6, and, no doubt, That Racist Jesse Jackson Who Is Racist And Anyone Who Disagrees With Mallard Is, By Default, Also Racist.)

*(Extra period added to the ellipsis above just so's you'll know I'ma quote me a Mallard strip in all its pube-lick edgy-cay-shun-al glory.)

BillyWitchDoctor said...

Also: David Horsey totally schools Bruce on how to make fun of candidates' spouses' snipery; he covers the topics of TWO Mallard strips in, it's funny.

See, Tinny? That's the sort of strip you would do if you had any talent.

12xuser said...

It's like Pulp Fiction. Next up, Angry Sun!

exanonymous said...

Here you are, billywitchdoctor:


Reasons why that link might be so hard to admit to: as is pointed out in the article, the law can easily be used for racial profiling, and it points out that the baggy pants are worn by kids and young black men (nevermind the fact that there are young white men in my neighborhood that do the same thing. FACT. And girls. Not Atlanta where they consider passing the law, but if someone presses for a law to fine someone for something they are under the impression is confined to a race, they are in fact racist, especially with such a flimsy argument. Bikinis these days show more than a bra, are targeted towards increasingly younger girls, and yet there's no fine for wearing that in public.)

Since Tinsley has already taken a side, he probably doesn't want people to read something that makes his side appear like racist tyrannical fogeys.

I don't particularly enjoy baggy pants, but someone trying to be badass with their pants around their ankles makes me giggle, not become enraged.

Erich said...

Here's another article about the baggy-pants "controversy."

One thing I found interesting: The whole fashion trend originated by imitating the look of prisoners, whose pants hang low because belts are not allowed. The fact that it would be against the law to dress like a convict could make for a great joke...but not in Tinsley's hands.