What's Mallard raving about today?
Only someone with a sick and perverted mind would interpret my chins as penis, now where did i put that vibrator to trace around ?.....
Nice tense shift, Tinsley.WV: nonglerr, as in "Tinsley is a total cocknonglerr."
Y'know, maybe that is MF quote above is authentic. Consider:"....interpret my chins as penis...."This is written by someone who thinks "penis" is a plural noun.
Again with the nose fetish, too. Sheesh. The talking-nose strip was a stupid idea, Bruce, born of too much Wild Turkey and Fresca. And the whole chincock thing is pretty glaring, too.Scene: the Tinshley boudoir."No, Bruce, dammit, I will not let you put that in my left nostril. I don't care if it turns you on, it's gross. Wait, what? You want me to put the strap-on where? Oh, just finish off that bottle and go to sleep."
Well, considering that Blallard doesn't actually have a chin, and a bill is a nose + mouth combination, the whole concept is phisiologically and anthopomophologically illogical.Now we have straw body parts. Where's Ray Bolger when you need him?
Not to mention the grammatical awkwardness of Mr. Noseworthy's response: "Not for TV news. It's too big." While he meant that Mallard's nose is too big for TV news, it could also be interpreted that TV news is too big for Mallard.
TINKLEY: Ooops, I forgot a punch line!I mean, seriously. This is supposed to be a joke about TV news being all about appearance rather than factiness. That's a workable premise (though it cuts a little close to Fox News' bread-and-butter.) But to make it "funny", the Aweful Admission has to come from someone the reader cares about. As written, it's merely an act of oppression against the protagonist (the character we're supposed to like), which lacks humor.Put it in physical terms: smacking Mallard in the face with a cream pie (while no doubt deserved) isn't really funny, whereas Mallard smacking someone ELSE in the face with a pie might be.So how to rewrite today's "comic" to make it funny?NOSEWORTHY: "You're a lifelong print reporter with a 'nose for news', but this is T.V. Your face doesn't measure up."FILLMORE: "I'll get a chin implant!"Now we have an actual punchline, and we can all relate to the ducky desperate for work. Who hasn't been there, done that?But the "joke" is still weak for a political comic, because it aims at the pretty faces, instead of the empty heads. Let's try again:NOSEWORTHY: "You're a lifelong print reporter with a 'nose for news', but this is T.V."FILLMORE: "OK, I can pretend to be stupid!"I'm not going to praise my own work (hey, this isn't my "15 Year Retrospective OMG LOL!" but I hope the re-write has an identifiable punchline directed against a deserving target.
Winn, and Winn again -Good job, lad.WV: symicali - the property of being squid-like
NOSEWORTHY: "You're a lifelong print reporter with a 'nose for news', but this is T.V."FILLMORE: "That's all right. I'm also good at spouting reactionary talking points without shame!"
Thanks, jazzbumpa, and thanks again for the re-winn joke.Any joke is better than no joke!I also liked the stark honesty (and therefore humor) of dlauthor's version " I'm also good at spouting reactionary talking points without shame!" but I don't expect either in the actual "comic"
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