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Friday, June 19, 2009

That damned huh?

What's Mallard raving about today?

Democrats, Racism.

Democrats filibustered Miguel Estrada because he was too Conservative. This makes them Democrats, by my calculation, not racist.

Unless Mallard want to stipulate to the following: Republicans who did not vote for Barack Obama because he was too Liberal are racist.


GeoX said...

This is hilarious. Yes, we oppose politicians who are too conservative. If you, Ducky, and your party, could restrict yourself to attacking politicians because they're too librul, nobody would say a word. Well, we'd roll our eyes at you, but that's sort of a given. But you CAN'T restrict it to that, can you? Responding to minority candidates in a racist way is just such second nature to you that you cannot help yourselves. Don't worry--we're used to it. Just stop trying to project your Tourette's Syndrome onto us.

exanonymous said...

Take just part of the cartoon:

"Democrats filibustered Miguel Estrada who was likely to be the first hispanic supreme court justice because he was conservative'........[sic] so who are the real "racists" here?

I'm going to go with conservatives as my final answer! Because the democrats filibustered him for the stated reason of conservatism according to the above paragraph, while he was apparently nominated by conservatives because he should pass the democrats' approval because he is hispanic.

All this really shows is that Mallard has no concept of what it means to not be racist. But we already knew that.

12xuser said...

I'm hoping that today's Mallard Fillmore will lead to a recursive negative feedback loop, in which Mallard's characters read "Mallard Fillmore", which tells them to "read today's Mallard Fillmore", so they read "Mallard Fillmore", and so on, until there is nothing left of the strip.

Rootbeer said...

So the comic strip "Mallard Fillmore" exists within the Mallardverse? That blows my mind.

I'm assuming that if the inner Mallard strip has the same relationship to the outer one as the outer one does to reality, it just consists of a stick figure with "LOL LIBZ" scrawled next to it.

dlauthor said...

Here's a horrifying thought: what if there's a real strip out there called "Bruce Tinsley"?

It'd be like Andy Capp, only with more anti-Semitism and set in Podunk, Indiana.

rewinn said...

If Estrada was filibustered because he is conservative, and that means his opponents are racists, then the only possible conclusion we can draw is that Conservatives consider themselves a separate race.

Does the Duckey REALLY wanna go there?


Meanwhile, I looked at "Today's Mallard Fillmore" and didn't see any drawings of Sotomayor, chunky or otherwise. If Tinkley had any talent at all, he'd have referred to a past or future strip in which he drew her ... anything but "today's" comic.

Robert said...

Today's strip, in short: Mallard isn't racist, he's chunkyist.

Hibryd said...

"So the comic strip 'Mallard Fillmore' exists within the Mallardverse? That blows my mind."

Yes, but it has a cumulative 4 week delay time on actual news.

("It's been two weeks since I read this comic about something that happened four weeks ago and I'm still surprised by X.")

fuckreagan said...

How appropriate that Tinsley has rone the forth wall-his comics mane as much sense as the Metab Gear frachise.

-Commuism Level 13 Rescue America, the "Return of Hohten "Tot" Mcocca."
-I say again. Your duty is to infiltrate White House Land and seize Obama, an abducted Hafrican terrorist.
-Elitist Level 7 Shoot down the Mexican invaders! Going Galt will have to be postponed if we are invaded by ricans.
-Snake, like Shakespeare said: "Nought's had, all's spent, Where our desire is
got without content." Basically, it means that your desire for sex. technology. charity and civib rights can get you into
trouble if you're not careful.
-That reminds me, I saw Dubya the other day in Shibomnigee. He said to give you his best.
-Obama is the famous purple stuffed worm in flap-jaw space with
the tuning fork who does a raw blink on Hara-kiri Rock. I need alcohol! 61!

fuckreagan said...

Sorry my eyoard is in terribe shape-

Anonymous said...

Hey, f-reagan -- did you let Tinshley buy your drinks or something?

Frank Stone said...

Poor li'l Brucie -- he's confused again.

(Although it was pretty funny that Mallard was telling his editor that he "need[ed] to read today's Mallard Fillmore", like a religious fanatic trying to convince a nonbeliever of the Truth of Christianity by telling him to read the Bible.)

rewinn said...

" a religious fanatic trying to convince a nonbeliever of the Truth of Christianity by telling him to read the Bible."


Faith is belief in the absence of evidence; this is a virtue to people who can't produce facts to create converts or sustain their ingroup. It all comes down to the proposition: "If you believe in what I believe, then you will believe what I believe" which is, of course, true.

I believe Mallard Fillmore and his ilk are not really trying to pursuade the unbeliever, but rather to promote in-group solidarity. As long as they are chanting and ranting the same Vogon-like phrases, they can't hear the whistling in their ears caused by the vacuum in their skulls.

Madpuppy said...

Here's a horrifying thought: what if there's a real strip out there called "Bruce Tinsley"?

The horrifying thought is that if there is a strip called "Bruce Tinsley", we may all be living in it right now.

Jazzbumpa said...

Reading Blallard is like watching a drunk masturbate in public.

I still have this problem with "like" vs. "as."

Anonymous said...

So, the Democrats rejected Estrada ONLY because he's a Latino. Then they turn around and nominate Sotamayor ONLY because she's a Latina.
This makes perfect sense to Ducky.

Other thoughts that are perfectly logical to Ducky, "Why does she always have to make her husband hit her?"

Bill the Splut said...

So the Dems should've voted for Estrada solely because he's Hispanic? Who would have thought that Dullard Failmore was in favor of affirmative action!

I think the Democrats should've voted for Estrada because he was so awesome as Ponch in CHiPs.

Michael said...

You're right, Mallard, there is someone who judges people not by the content of their character but by the color of their skin... but it's not the Democrats.