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Saturday, December 03, 2011

That damned Fragrance

What's Mallard raving about today?

Gifts, Frangarnce

Mallard knows what men who haven't bathed smell like.


Tog said...

Mallard's "advice" continues to be "not this, not that, NO, NO, NO! GOD! IT ALL SUCKS! YOU SUCK!"

And apparently Batshit's hung around a LOT of men who use fragrances if he can state he knows what "most" of them smell like but can still filter out the ones who actually don't bathe. Say sayin'.

Not that there's anything wrong with that. ...Hanging out and smelling lots and lots of men, that is. You really should bathe.

"It's just not natural!"
-- Batshit, through a Homophobic Persecuted Conservative College Professor straw-man character

DharmaPete said...

May Bruchie's Christmas be filled with nothing but sweaters, little "maker" machines, and men's fragrances.

Kip W said...

Everybody stinks but Mallard.

So this old lady goes to the doctor and says, "I pass gas silently, without odor." The doc says, "After we fix your hearing aid we'll see what we can do about that sense of smell."

Everybody stinks but Mallard.

rewinn said...

Holiday Trivia: Of the Biblical three Gifts to Jesus - Gold, Frankincense and Myrrh - two of these are valuable precisely because they smell nice.

Why does Mallard hate Christianity?

Frank Stone said...

I think I understand where Mallard's coming from on this one: There actually are plenty of old folks who believe that wearing excessive amounts of cologne or perfume is an acceptable substitute for bathing. And being the equivalent of a cranky old man, Mallard spends a lot of his time around them. And then bitches about how much he hates them. It's just like his relationship with TV.

Andrew said...

"If we wanted them, we'd buy them for ourselves"

Isn't that true of ANYTHING?

Oh, I get it. Tinsley thinks that Christmas gifts are only good if they're things you want but can't afford.

Oh, and Bruce? maybe someone's trying to tell you something if they'r buying you fragrances. Just sayin'.

deepbeep said...

If a guy shaves his armpits, he probably bathes regularly too.

wv: fitabed. What your car can't do, so you gotta call your brother-in-law.

DiR said...

I wonder what the thought process on this one was.
"Hmmm, this starts off pretty good, it's concise, mildly insightful, pretty much un-offensive... yeah, how can I go head and fuck this up? I know! I'll keep adding words, and a veiled 'fuck you' at people who do things different from I! Can has paycheck now?"