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Monday, December 19, 2011

Those damned Catalogs

What's Mallard raving about today?

Catalogs

Mallard's Season of Petty gripes continues unabated.

And, you filthy Secular Humanist Atheist, it's Christmas Safety Tips, not Holiday Safety Tips.

10 comments:

Frank Stone said...

Well, Mallard, that's what happens when you pass out in a puddle of your own puke for three days: the mail tends to pile up.

And did I miss something, or has Mallard always been colored green (or black, depending on how lazy Brucie was feeling that day) only from the neck up?

Rootbeer said...

Mallard Fillmore: hoarder. His home is so cluttered with junk mail and bottles of old urine that he can't move about without risking injury.

Mallard Fillmore: recluse. To him, the hall outside his one-room efficiency apartment at the halfway house qualifies as "outside".

Kip W said...

Some of us wear pants outdoors.

Anonymous said...

Tinsley complains about catalogs, yet they are the perfect tool for his craft: Cutting random letters out of others' work, putting them together in ways that resemble sentences, and turning them into hate mail and Nazi cartoons.

Tinsley lost the right to Godwin's Law after he said racism was dead, never existed, and burning books was O.K.

Word Verification: Snelfaf, the act of shoving random shit up your nose and into your brain, like Homer with his crayons. No matter how much you snelfaf, you will never be able ot tolerate Mallard Fillmore and will be literally infinitely smarter than Tinsley.

rewinn said...

CONGRATULATIONS TO KIP W .

"Martyrbation" just made the Urban Dictionary!

This was Kip's neologism from a few days back, which I submitted to the Dictionary a few days ago. Use it often - after all, it's much more creative than true than any full weeks of Mallard Fillmore.

rewinn said...

Oh, and about today's "comic" ... that's the worst excuse for an alcoholic's stumble-and-fall ever!

"I haven't had a drink in months. I just slipped on some junk mail."

DiR said...

I solve this by A) not getting stumbling drunk and B) not leaving weeks worth a mail on the floor of my house.

To each their own, I guess?

CW in LA said...

Guess DiR's one a' them ee-litists.

Kip W said...

rewinn, thanks! The word deserves wider exposure. I didn't come up with it, though. I think I saw it at TBogg, or maybe Sadly, No! I do try and use it whenever applicable, which is depressingly often.

A tip of the hat for taking the initiative at Urbanizing it!

Kip W said...

ps: I voted you up.