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Tuesday, March 18, 2008

Those damed Guns

What's Mallard raving about today?

Guns, Drugs.

Essay question:

Has Mallard made the least equivalent comparison in human history? Discuss.

8 comments:

factinista said...

Complaining about guns being banned is one thing, but Mallard is likely calling for an end to gun control as well. I could imagine Mallard saying that if people were allowed to bring guns into airports that 9/11 wouldn't have happened, completely ignoring the consequences.

BillyWitchDoctor said...

Maybe I'm not looking in the right places, but the only other people I've heard or read making the argument for the return of Wild West days have been Wayne La Pierre, assorted militia nutjobs, and, when he fantasizes about murdering people he disagrees with, Bill O'Reilly. If Tinny does buy into that nonsense, that's pretty lousy company.

I'ma say it again: when Mallard arrived in Washington DC, he was ducking (HAW HAW) a hail of bullets. And yet, I'm pretty sure he has never, in all his years of existence, carried a firearm.

Matt Ramone said...

So...is he saying that drugs should be legal? Cause I'm all for that.

Kaitlyn said...

We should be high and armed.

Oh, the hilarity!

If drugs were legal, many people would never be criminals.

rewinn said...

Let's apply the same logic to speed limits.

If speeding were illegal, lawbreakers are still going to speed. The only people at a disadvantage are the law-abiding citizens! Why should lawbreakers get the advantage? Speed limits hurt only those who obey the law!

Each citizen should have the freedom to decide how fast to go, rather than some oppressive government!!!

Next up: those oppressive laws dictating which side of the road to drive on.

Michael said...

Matt Ramone, I think Mallard really is saying we should legalize drugs. But it's unclear, because the cartoon's logic indicates it was drawn while on PCP. If he did clearly advocate for drug legalization, I would give him props for actually acting like the "libertarian" he claims to be, instead of a Republican shill.

And, what Kaitlyn and rewinn said.

"We should be high and armed"... wait a minute, I think Tinsley is advocating our whole country go Gonzo!

Has Michael gained a newfound respect for Tinsley?? Or will it evaporate with his next retarded cartoon? Stay tuned!

exanonymous said...

Funny, Tinsley.

Know what else criminals don't obey?
Common courtesy and warning.

Gee, sir, better be careful, I'm going to pull out this gun and hold it to your head and demand your cell phone tomorrow. Unless you have a gun. Then I'll shoot you.

Goodday miss, a week from now I will be entering your house while you are home to rob you of your valuables. Make sure your gun is fully loaded and easily accessible and hope your 10-year old doesn't find it first!

Hey, kiddo, hope you aren't on shift tomorrow at the McD's because I'm gonna rob it! Or, if you are, make sure to put your customers at ease to carry your handgun in your apron fully loaded and ready to fire. It'll be fun! We'll shoot at each other over the counter! I bet dodging bullets is way more fun than giving me the $267 I'll get from the cash register.

Just an email to the classmates of the Wednesday 1:30 Latin class. I'll be going ape$hit with a semi-automatic, so make sure you pack accordingly!

Those weren't actually funny. Just the gahgah sort of world one must live in to think guns solve everything and should be allowed everywhere by everyone.

Kaitlyn said...

Ex, I know they weren't *actually* funny, but they were way funnier than any Mallard comic ever.

And some non-Mallard ones.

It's funny because it's absurd.