Project Wonderful Banner

Saturday, January 19, 2008

Those damned women

What's Mallard raving about today?


Mallard feels people who are able to be happy for others are "weird."

Yup, that seems to cover it.


BillyWitchDoctor said...

The original final line was "Wooo,...Women are stoopid!...They shouldn't be trusted with anything,...Let alone a presidency!...," but he ran out of space for all the errant commas and ellipses, and his syndicate (like all media, secretly run by the Jews, don'tcha know) made him tone the rest of it down.

Frankie Machine said...

You must forgive Tinsley for not being good at depicting women.
It's been so long since a real one actually spoke to him.

rewinn said...

OK, are there any women who think that strip is funny?

Anonymous said...

This is why college republicans never get laid.

Dave Robidenza said...

Wait... who is that woman? Does she work with Mallard? That's what you get when you read a strip which has a "cast" of several characters but 99% of the time features one character and/or the strawman du jour.

And I thought Mallard worked in D.C. I'm pretty sure they have computer security consultants based locally and no one has to fly in from San Antonio to do any major work. At first, I thought the joke was that Doug (who, coincidentally, is the name of the vocally conservative IT guy at my job) had only been in town for a day or so, had fallen in love with Kristen and they were now getting married and the "joke" was about how people get married with the same forethought that they put into their grocery shopping. I suppose it's a bit odd to be too excited about the nuptials of someone you barely know, but I think Mallard would be blasé about any good news for his own family or friends (hypothetically speaking, of course).

BillyWitchDoctor said...

Wait... who is that woman? Does she work with Mallard?

Yup. That boggle-eyed, shoulder-less, heroin-addicted banshee is what's left of Chantel, whom oh-so-tolerant Mallard wants to either perform acts of bestiality with--or murder--depending on the mood. (Click the link to see what the heck I'm talking about, and what Chantel looked like back when Tinny gave a crap.)

...Hey, I thought conservatives were supposed to be excited about hetero marriage, not liberals.

dlauthor said...

From Chantel's profile on the above-linked page:

"[Mallard] can tolerate her politics ..."

Since fucking WHEN? When has Mallard tolerated anything even vaguely liberal?

I also like that the title of the strip, at the top of the page, includes the dreaded four-dot ellipsis-for-no-reason. Plus ca change ...(.)

Anonymous said...

I just simply don't get any twinkle of a kernel of humor here; I often hate these strips, but it's a little rare to be utterly baffled as to the joke. Have panels been left out?

Kaitlyn said...

"Do they work here?"

Mallard doesn't even know who he works with!

Notice he doesn't say her name, he has no idea who that woman is.

exanonymous said...

I am a woman, and that wasn't funny. It wasn't offensive either. It wasn't even men from mars women from venus-y. Insert a male saying the same thing (might have to take out a few exclamation points, the gossip might not be so perky, but they do it), and what you got is a pathetic duck who can't even manage small talk at the office but makes a living supposedly as a journalist.

It is hilarious if you imagine the lowering brow of Mallard as an indication of the psychopathic rage he will unleash, preferably at Kristen's and Doug's wedding.

Erich said...

"You mean you bothered to learn the name of somebody who was only here temporarily? And you actually took an interest in his life? Weird."

Kaitlyn said...

I'm a woman and I couldn't care less about weddings (except for family, of course!), but god. What a rude little duck.

Make some small talk, it won't kill you.

rewinn said...

billwitchdoctor - thanks for the link to the sad cast of characters for this strip.

It appears not to have been updated since Y2K, e.g.

"Mr. Noseworthy is still adjusting to being a grownup of the '90s"

... and the reference to the lack of Asians in the NBA.

Who can fault a daily cartoonist for being a decade behind the times?