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Saturday, May 21, 2011

That damned Maid

What's Mallard raving about today?

Emails.

Mallard's perfect timing continues...a day after a Right Wing Lap Dog mis-spells "lunch" in the comments here at Duck and Cover, Mallard rails about a high school student mis-spelling a word in an Email to Mallard Fillmore.

So, Anonymous commenter, your idol, Mallard Fillmore thinks you're an idiot.

14 comments:

CW in LA said...

I've seen the Tinsh mis-spell 'publicly' as "publically" in his sorry little comic strip. So he can fuck the hell off.

DiR said...

"hope it wasn't English class"

Viewing audience, you spot the mistake!

Factinista said...

1. "Email" is spelled without the hyphen now.

2. "Westside" shouldn't be at the end of the sentence.

3. "Westside" shouldn't be in quotation marks.

4. Four-dot ellipses shouldn't be in the middle of a sentence. It should be a colon here.

5. Three-dot ellipses shouldn't be at the end of a sentence.

6. Two sentences are missing a subject.

Final grade: D-. See me after class.

Randy said...

WTF is a "memo-line"? Does he mean the "Subject" header?

Hope you weren't sending this from handwriting class, Tinshley.

BigFatHeart said...

Correcting someone's spelling: the easiest way to defend yourself from criticism without having to actually, you know, use any logic or a well-constructed and reasoned argument. Sounds about perfect for Mallard. Especially since it's the sort of thing that Mallard would call smug elitism in anyone who used it on him, so it fits in well with his flawless record of hypocrisy.

Kip W said...

Sock it to those high-school students, man! That'll teach them who's tough, and who knows how to spell some words, and who's enough of an asshole to use his bully pulpit to try and embarrass some high-school students.

Bill the Splut said...

Whoa, baby! Minor errors in spelling and grammar! What are the ones bad enough to keep to yourself like?

Next on "Whose Memo-Line Is It Anyway?" Bruce shares emails from right wingers who agree with him about the president's lumch! The only correctly spelled words are "Muslim n****r."

Michael Foley said...

Yeah Mallard, speak truth to power!

Tinsley: Sociopath said...

Obviously, the high school were using irony to express their disgust towards Tinsley's terrible writing. Tinsley, being a subliterate retard, failed to notice this, and complained about the writing. This is hypocritical, as always, because Tinsley believes the educated and literate are evil and should be tortured and killed in preparing for going Galt.

Tinsley: Sociopath said...

I just reread the comic because I needed some incentive to commit suicide, and I noticed something interesting about the wording. Tinsley makes the quote sound like it is the shared memo line, but if one reads carefully--which one should never do with a Mallard Fillmore--the vague wording indicates that the two are separate entities. Tinsley used ambiguous writing--not that he can spell or define ambiguous--to make all of the writers look like fools. Remember that every Mallard Fillmore has a horrifying subtext to match the equally-terrible obvious message.

Word Verification: Coaructm, everything Tinsley does, says, and believes is so far from what is correct that it is coaructm.

rewinn said...

Thank you Mallard Fillmore for showing us how petty you are.

Assigning the composition of an email would be a pretty reasonable assignment since that's probably the most common use of written English these days. Mallard should be happy someone read his "comic" and cared enough to respond; the purpose of a newspaper is to sell ad space, and it doesn't matter whether you attract eyeballs by love or by hate, just so long as enough of them click through on the ads.

I wouldn't expect any instructor to grade the email *before* it is sent; this would require the student to send it to the instructor, rather than the recipient. It's much more reasonable to have the student send the email and cc the teacher. In that case, the email would have errors in it, which the teacher would correct ... that's how school works!

Homonym-based misspellings are common enough to rate criticism of them as "cheap shots"; at least the kid didn't invent new words like "misunderestimate" or "refudiate", or claim he was qualified to be president.

Finally, the text in today's "comic" needs editting so badly as to make the punchline funny in a way directly opposite of Brewsky's intent. A reader of ordinary intelligence need not be told that the email in "Mallard's Mailbag" has been sent "to me" (?who else gets mail in your mailbag LOL?)
The phrase ", that are too good to keep to myself" has no function. Structurally, it is saying "ha ha, this is going to be funny!" which is pointless (because why else would Mallard be quoting the email?) and mean (because it's picking on a kid who's trying to learn to write).
"Memo-line" is not only the wrong English phrase (as Factinista correctly points out - a "memo line" is an area on a document such as a check for further description of the purpose of the documents; it is never the header or subject line) but it is wrong to hyphenate "memo line" ... which makes the punchline (...or should I write "punch-line"???) VERY FUNNY but not in the way Bruwsky Tinshley intended.

I wonder if Brewsky has actually seen a document with a memo line lately, e.g. a paycheck?

Randy said...

@rewinn: Your "editting" is a nice demonstration of the rule that any critique of another's grammer or speling will contain at least a typo itself. ;) (But I don't consider it to invalidate any of your points at all, unlike some artists.)

The phrase "too good to keep to myself" is Tinshley's clumsy way of saying that, even with such poor quality, they're still much better than he deserves.

That was me, not Factinista, that pointed out the "memo-line". (I got it because it was about all that was left after Factinista.)

rewinn said...

@Randy - heh-heh well said! But I have always mistrusted the word "editing" since it looks like it should be pronounced "ee-dii-ting". If Shakespeare could be casual about spelink, who am Aye to pretend to be his bettre?

Rootbeer said...

This is like the pot demanding to see the kettle's real birth certificate.