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Wednesday, July 21, 2010

That damned Paste

What's Mallard raving about today?

Soccer, Paste.

The Right Wing in a nutshell: If I say something often enough, whether it is true or not, we can convince like-minded simpletons it's true.

As someone once said, it's like they take pride in being ignorant.


Faster, Harder, More Challenging GeoX said...

Eating paste would certainly be more entertaining than reading Mallard FIllmore. If only TINSLEY had grown out of it, we might not be subject to idiotic comics like this.

I was under the impression that he notionally LIKED little kids, what with the insincere Father's Day comics and being pro-"life" and all. Apparently, if they get in the way his soccer hate-on, they become brain-damaged idiots. Sorry, kiddies!

But seriously, if you wanted to be VERY generous and describe his previous anti-soccer diatribes as "good-natured ribbing," this would be the point at which it shades over into nothing more than "Hey! Look what an asshole I am!" Yes, Tinsley. We see.

Tog said...

Gosh, I wonder why Batshit fixated on paste-eating. (He strikes me as more of a "booger" connoisseur, personally.)

Another thing children are expected to develop is a sense of perspective and proportion, rather than harranguing on and on (for, you know, a whole week) about every little thing that doesn't please them.

Children who don't grow out of that run the risk of becoming FOXNews pundits (AKA Horses' Asses), assuming they have an aptitude for lying.

exanonymous said...

Maybe Mallard should have a word with the young Republican men I knew who played soccer in high school and college about how immature they are. Of course, they have the fitness level required to make him eat paste so it would never happen.

Steve-O said...

Really? A whole week of "I hate soccer"!?!? Newspapers actually pay for this shit?

I never want to read Bruce Tinsley complaining about welfare recipients again in my life.

dlauthor said...

Small children also draw badly and enjoy repetition. But they don't want to roll on your dusty floor, Brucie.

Meanwhile, somewhere, Anonyrast reads about preschoolers eating paste and faps himself unconscious.

Kip W said...

Tin's making his play to position himself as a world-class athlete! In order to do this, he has to get paste eating established as a major sport. After that, the sky's the limit. He's been working up to this for years!

Eno said...

See, this might be considered very current and edgy if, y'know, the World Cup wasn't over already.

Actually no, it still wouldn't be very edgy. Right wing xenephobia continues to show no boundaries.

Toots McGee said...

The only thing that could make this lamer is if Tinsley was soliciting donations from his readers.

(yes, muir is doing this...I peek at his webcomic every once in a while and yes, it's still sucks. I'm sure anony has pitched in his cool G.)

Beef Wellington said...

In america we do things a certian way, children make rash uneducated observations becuase they don't know better, eventually they grow out of it, If only tinz could do the same he would'nt sound like a moron all the time.

Ducky is Right said...

Wow. Defensive, much? Way to transition from, "I am disinterested in soccer" and come right out with, "soccer must be eradicated." Whatsamatter, pumpkin? Are the Herculean, chisel-bodied, toned brown people making you feel inadequate?

Say, now that you mention it, you know what else little children do? They play football. And baseball. And basketball. Perhaps they, and the fans of their sports, also need to grow out of it?

Children are also know for sitting around the house, watching hours of trash TV a day, making poor life decisions, and complaining bitterly when they don't get their way.

You see what I'm getting at?

Anonymous said...

I thought this was interesting and even a wee bit eye-opening as far as Tinshley's psyche goes. It's that phrase "Here... we do things a certain way".
No we don't. Here, we have freedom (in theory) to do whatever we want. We can like soccer, we can prefer cats over dogs, we can criticize mistakes that America made in its past. All of which Tinshley would prefer that we not do.
In Tinshley's perfect little world, I suppose, we would all be living in Bedford Falls and behaving like pre-suicidal Jimmy Stewart. If we deviate from his script, we must be marginalized. What a sad, blinkered world view he has.

Tog said...

Toots McGee wrote: "...if Tinsley was soliciting donations from his readers. Yes, Muir is doing this..."

Wow. Are you kidding me? That's the funniest thing Muir's ever accomplished.

I'm immediately reminded of Linda Tripp's donation drive, the proceeds of which were supposed to help her "legal council" (because the Clinton Conspiracy was out to destroy--MAYBE EVEN KILL--her, ooooEEEEEooooo). She spent it on things like cosmetic surgery instead.

rewinn said...

Some eat paste. Some eat lead paint chips ... and grow up to be rightwing cartoonists.

On the evidence.