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Thursday, November 11, 2010

That damned Admission

What's Mallard raving about today?

Juan Williams.

Hmmmm. I think I see where this is going.

A new Right Wing bête noire makes an appearance each day, while Mallard protests his lactose intolerance.

Finally, Rupert Murdoch offers Mallard $2m to join Fox because there is no depth to which Fox won't sink.

That's when the panels get a little sticky.

This could win in the category of Most Interminable Series as well if Mallard plays his cards right.


Faster, Harder, More Challenging GeoX said...

Good lord--Tinsley's almost achieving the impossible task of making me feel sorry for him. This "lactose intolerance" business is just so toweringly, transcendentally stupid--and he's just so completely oblivious to this, and in fact thinks he's being very's just painful to watch.

Fortunately, we all know what a racist shitheel the man is, so I don't actually feel too bad.

Tog said...

Today is Veterans' Day.

And who remembered veterans today? Garry Trudeau.

Batshit, on the other hand, spends it crying because a bigot lost his job over bigotry.

Did he forget Veterans' Day again? Or is he simply no longer pretending he ever cared?

Perhaps he could twitter about it.

Tyler McDowell said...

If you replace "Keith Olbermann" with "Bill O'Reilly" and "lactose intolerant" with "homosexual," it's almost satire!

Rootbeer said...

How do we know that's not Tucker Carlson pretending to be Keith Olbermann on the phone...?

dlauthor said...

Rootbeer wins the comments for the day.

Incidentally, one wonders if Brucie's lactose intolerant too. Those white Russians must be murder on him if he is. And you know he doesn't go near that faggy soy milk stuff.

rewinn said...

On Veterans' Day, let's make two resolutions:

1. Take care of our wounded Veterans (something conservatices talk about but very often fail to do .... because it costs money)

2. Take care not to create more wounded Veterans unless directly related to the protection of our Nation (... and fighting a land war in Asia has never qualified)

P.S. was there a new "Mallard Fillmore" today? It's hard to tell one pile of duck droppings from another.

Frank Stone said...

Shhh... no one tell Brucie that Keith Olbermann doesn't know or care who he is. Let him dream...

What's truly sad about all this, of course, is that this multi-day conceptual train wreck is what passes for a clever metaphor in what passes for Bruce's mind.

Bill the Splut said...

Keith OlberStrawman was right the first time.

Beef Wellington said...

Tinsley tries his hardest to convince us that everyone is as racist as he is, Which is weird because racism is dead, I know because Mallard said so.

Ducky is Right said...

Again, Ducky lives his own little world world where these people A: know who he is, b: give a shit.

It should be illegal to write scripts this bad.

Marion Delgado said...

One of the things that has made me the angriest about you self-appointed critics who could not even do Mallard Fillmore if your lives depended on it. You always criticize him for "forgetting" Veterans Day. Every year. Well, I hate to inform you, but he has to turn in his comics 2 weeks in advance. So how is he to know about an event TWO WEEKS IN THE FUTURE?

You see how ridiculous you all are? Maybe next year when Mallard/Bruce "forgets" Veterans Day you'll think "oh, it's not him forgetting Veterans Day. It's not him not supporting the troops. It's me trying the same old tired attack and forgetting I was owned for it last year. I better cut it out."

But I think that's too much to ask for troop-hating Blame-America-Firsters who drool over Doonesbury.

Ducky is Right said...


Tog said...

@Marion Delgado:
Well played, sir! ;)

MartyRotten said...

Okay, I knew a month ago when Veterans day is and I don't even do a lame comic strip like Tinsley. So "two weeks in advance" is a lame excuse to say the least. I"m sure Tinsley has a calender and knows when his holidays are (we have seen this in the past) when he's not so incredibly hung over that he can't even see straight.
True, this week's Doonesbury is a reprint, but at least he's relevantly addressing the problems many combat veterans face upon returning home.
Oh, and the "lactose intolerance" joke was done much better as a throwaway line on "Seinfeld".

Tog said...

Guys, I think Marion's being sarcastic. God, I certainly HOPE so.

exanonymous said...

Waah waah waah juan williams.

The guy had a contract. His employer feels he broke it.

Veteran's Day always makes me sad. There's more veterans each year, and many are quite badly off. I'd rather give them better care, less war, and better job prospects than a single day of flag-waving chest-thumping "patriotism."

Erich said...

Yes, Marion was joking...the really funny part, though, is that he's pretty much paraphrasing Tinsley's own defense from another time he neglected to do a Veteran's Day strip. Back in 2006 (I think), Tinsley ran a belated Veteran's Day tribute in which he explained the omission by saying "I'm drawn two weeks in advance." It was a lame excuse then, too.

Erich said...

Found the previous incident in question:

Kip W said...

Is it possible Tin simply misheard someone calling Mallard a "quack butthook"?