Project Wonderful Banner

Sunday, November 23, 2008

Those damned Pilgrims

What's Mallard raving about today?

Pilgrims, Xenophobes, Guns, Religion.

I spent the last 8 years being described as a traitor, as a terrorist sympathizer, as Anti-American, and more recently as a Socialist/Marxist by extension.

So any whiny babies who are offended about Obama's statement that they cling to religion and guns out of bitterness can seriously just get over it already, because I could care less about their poor little hurt feelings.


Factinista said...

So are we just supposed to gloss over the wholesale slaughter of an entire continent that these people enacted? 'Cause Mallard seems pretty defensive of them.

Anonymous said...

What a beautiful perspective Mallard shows in this comic. He views his enemies as animals that must be slaughtered and eaten by religious fundamentalists who a few decades after arriving declared random people as witches and had them burned alive.

That certainly explains his support of outsourcing torture, and locking up 70% innocent people in camps (according to the officials actually running Gitmo). Including children.

The sub-humans and their silly U.S. Constitution can not be allowed to exist, eh Tinsley?

Neo Tuxedo said...

So any whiny babies who are offended about Obama's statement that they cling to religion and guns out of bitterness can seriously just get over it already

Alternatively, they could read the entire statement, not just the part the so-called liberal media saw fit to repeat, and learn that Obama said they only get so bitter and clingy because their government has failed them. But that would mean finding out what's really going on, not just being content to let Fixed Noise and the rest of the SCLM pour sprun into their ears, and for some reason we can't have that.

*hands Anon the keys to a shiny new Internets*

NotannonNotcow said...


NLC said...

re folks being "bitter".

I've said before and I'll say it again:

Do you know anyone who's not bitter over what has happened to this country over the last eight years?

Moreover, this is a self-obvious fact. Then to be called "elitist" for simply acknowledging this by someone who is so out of touch with the American people that they can pretend that this is some kind of loony, fringe opinion is just... well, it's simply...

[OK, I'm at a loss for words here. I was going to say something like "stupid" or "idiotic". But this
arrogant combination of blatant lies and simple denial of reality goes way beyond that.

We need a new adjective here. Until someone comes up with something better, I'm just going to call this "Mallardic".]

fuckreagan said...

Religion is (as a certain man whose beliefs I deny endorsing implied) the opium of superstitous idiots who live miserable lives. Pilgrims lived in small, impoverished communities, away from the technologies and medicines of England, thus, their only respites were the myths of God and the afterlife. We have disproved both myths: Energy diffuses as it travels, thus, it cannot last forever, therefore, nothing is infinite and there is no God or afterlife.

Bruce "Anonymous" Tinsley, yesterday, accused us of having terrible vocabularies. He put down the keg, today and used the word "xenophobic."

Let me try to use my vocabulary: Bruce Tinsley can be concatenated to horrible malfeasant men, policies and enormities (look it up, "enormity" does not mean "enormousness.") He is incredibly obdurate and derisive towards anything good.

fuckreagan said...

I realize, rereading that post that I implied Bruce Tinsley was obdurate towards anything good. I meant that he was obdurate, I know that one cannot be obdurate towards something.

12xuser said...

How Tinsley drags pilgrims into this pathetic retread of a primary-season attack on Obama is beyond me. This could have been the Minutemen, or Abe Lincoln, or any figure from American history, and it would have made as much sense.

Anyone who says that the Republicans haven't capitalized on the bitterness of people who cling to "Guns, God, and (anti)Gays" to advance their anti-working class agenda, is either ignorant or lying.

Remember, Tinsley submitted this two days before the election, knowing that the election would be nearly three weeks gone when it appeared. Could he have been more wrong about what people are concerned about at this moment in history?

NLC said...

Anyone who says that the Republicans haven't capitalized on the bitterness of people who cling to "Guns, God, and (anti)Gays" to advance their anti-working class agenda, is either ignorant or lying.


Robert said...

The "bitter" comment took place in the spring, which in today's news cycle, makes this shit about as timely as a Lewinsky joke.

Michael said...

Look a little further to the left, Pilgrims! A delicious duck!

Mr Arcane Chili said...

I think we all understand that historical accuracy is not Tinsley's main strength, but if can ignore all of the historical Disneyfication about the Pilgrims, the characterization by the Turkeys is not all that far off.

It seems that they were pretty commonly reviled by the folks around them for their rabid, self-righteous intolerance (for example by the non-religious pioneers who made up the other 1/2 of the Mayflower's passengers). And more to the point, it wasn't that long before their successors were hanging Quakers in the Boston Commons for heresy.

rewinn said...

"....characterization by the Turkeys is not all that far off..."


The most important contribution of the Pilgrims to America's development may be in being so nasty, intolerant and violent that Ben Franklin fled to Philadelphia, where he launched a career that ultimately lead to our great nation.

(He may not have been the Father of our entire country, but he was father to as much of it as he could.)

Anonymous said...

Thought for today...

"If a tree falls in the forest and nobody's there, does it make a sound? If Obama's running around saying all kinds of weird, strange things and nobody is criticizing him for them, did he say strange things?"

Anonymous said...

Y'know, at this point, we should just rename this blog "That's Our Tinny!" and use that as a standard response to everything he does.

Anonymous said...

I am a Christian and a socialist, a member of the Democratic Party USA, a rabid supporter of the 2nd amendment, and an advocate for open borders so all available workers can work freely and with all legal rights and remedies. In my adult life I have supported Clinton, Bush, and I will support President-elect Obama.

One of the biggest problems in our country is that many who claim to be Christians do not follow His law. They feel that they are "special" or "better" because of THEIR beliefs, when it is His commandments we should follow. In true biblical Christianity, our only province is to bring the Word of God to the world by following His example.

I have no doubt that "religion" is the opiate of the masses, for thousands of years it was used to control the masses. But I also do not doubt that Christ is about "relationship" not "religion."

As a Christian I cling to the Word of God, as an American I cling to the right to defend my family (and others') from physical harm, but both of these identities also compel me to welcome anyone who comes to this country to work.

The Lord truly blesses everyone who works and commands us to bless those who do not (or cannot) work.

I am not bitter, I am not fearful, I do not judge nor condemn others. I respect everyone's right to their opinion, even if I do not believe it myself.

I hope we can all use this time to realize that religion, as man-made, has failed us and been used to enslave us and keep us ignorant. This is opposite of what a relationship with God would do for us!

As a Creator, the Lord cannot be understood in scientific terms. He is above the physical universe and our respective acknowledgments of prevailing scientific consensus, derived through the scientific method of research, is neither a bar to, nor can it be used to boost, the belief in an infinite God.

Countless billions of evils have been done in the name of God, gods, no-gods, chauvinism, religion, politics, revenge, ideology, no-reason, ad infinitum... We must look forward and not lay the blame on any one belief. We must work to ensure that no more people suffer for any reason.

We cannot allow ourselves, irrespective of our differing beliefs, to be controlled or marginalized by a media who cares more about making money than providing us with objective truths. Indeed, in that respect, I would suggest that it is media that is now the true opiate of the masses~ media and its cousin entertainment. What did Juvenal say? panem et circenses?

Everett Volk said...

Does Tinsley understand that, in 1621, the Pilgrims were the most recent immigrant class to reach the North American continent and thus, as the newest foreigners, could not, by definition, be xenophobic?

Scanman said...

The cartoon doesn't make sense. The turkeys are the only ones who could possibly be xenophobes in this scenario.