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Monday, February 23, 2009

Those damned Oscars

What's Mallard raving about today?

The Oscars.

What the hell? No mention of Liberals in Hollywood? What about Environmental sanctimony?

Who's writing Mallard Fillmore these days?


GeoX said...

Leaving aside the laughable notion that Tinsley has a problem with parochialism, he's quite right; I can think of very few things I would not rather do than watch Hollywood's big ol' annual circle-jerk. Not that being right in this one instance makes him FUNNY or anything.

The really disturbing question: is that a bathrobe Chantel is wearing? Does this mean--gah--she's supposed to be cohabiting with Mallard? Not a pretty thought, is it?

Michael said...

This isn't the first time Chantel has spent the night. I'm sure her friends are baffled why she continues to "slum it with that loser duck."

And I don't want to know why she has a Queen Amidala lip.

ajm said...

Who CARES why they're called "the Oscars" are why would ANYBODY call someone a "philistine" for not knowing?

Your persecution complex is showing, Tins.

NLC said...

Proposed new standard acronym:

JTIOM [Just Turn It Off, Mallard]

Like most good solutions: Quick, simple and foolproof.

[WV: cutsub: Don't know what it means, but let's watch MF make it Obama's fault, even though The Press tried to blame it on BushII.]

Jer said...

Wow, Tinsley almost wrote a comic that has no ideological bias. I bet he did it by accident - I'm positive he probably thinks that every liberal loves the Oscars more than apple pie and baseball and so he probably jumped up and yelled "Take That Liberals!" when he finished this one.

dlauthor said...

And, of course, the new producers managed to bring the "four-hour" program in at a shade under three and a half hours. Soooo ... wrong again, Tinshley.

rewinn said...

Chantel's spending the night with Mallard is either very innocent or very exotic.

Ponder the mechanics of male-duck and female-human: It's either "Rubby Ducky, You're The One" or "Leda and the Swan".


BTW she insults him with the effetely elite word "Philistine" to drive home the point that she's an effete elite snobwoman, oppressing the downtrodden guy who's secretly smarter than her..

dlauthor said...

Sadly, I think Tinshley's vision for Mallard and Chantel's relationship is less "rubber ducky" than "ducky rubbers."


Squid Vicious said...

Good Lord, Tinkley is actually funny. I may have to vote Republican now.

GeoX said...

There is a joke here about duck penises that I am absolutely NOT GOING TO MAKE.

Word verification: "inspiart." A portmanteau of two words neither of which, interestingly enough, ever apply to Tinsley.

Anonymous said...

NLC said...
"Proposed new standard acronym:

JTIOM [Just Turn It Off, Mallard]

Like most good solutions: Quick, simple and foolproof."

4:50 AM

NLC, I agree, but why does this not work for those who do not like Mallard Fillmore or Rush Limbaugh? Don't read Mallard and don't listen to Rush.

But in one case this is still not good enough for most liberal leaning folks. They want to see Limbaugh shut down. Even though they don't listen to him, they don't want anyone else to listen to him. After all he is the most listened to talk show radio host in America.

His most recent contract was an eight year deal for $400 million.

GeoX said...

"Why do conservatives always confuse harsh criticism with attempted censorship?" he asked, not expecting any sort of coherent answer.

Kaitlyn said...

I read some comments at that said that Slumdog only won because of PC something or other.

And then there was Sean Penn's speech.

I'm just shocked he did it so close to the actual date!

He's been so... on time lately. Did some poor intern have to work as his personal assistant?

exanonymous said...


Squawking about how popular Rush is.


Squawking about how mean it is that nobody covers the faults of the Obama administration.

The next day-

Squawking that no one should read Mallard Fillmore if they didn't like it.

The day after that-

Squawking that liberals don't have a right to criticize Mallard Fillmore because they don't read it.

dlauthor said...

Anonymous Duckfart is the kind of guy who pees in a pool, then complains about the smell of urine.

Word Verification: "ingly." Like tingly, but genuinely unpleasant. As in, "a woman I know went on a blind date with Anonymous Duckfart once, but his blowup sex doll with Sean Hannity's face glued to it made her feel ingly, so she left."

rewinn said...

Please be gentle!

Reichwingers are weak. If you say anything bad about them, they suffer soooooo badly that they must find solace in the bottle or the pill-bottle.

So, please: don't point out any failing in Mallard, Rush or the GOP.

They're weak.