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Friday, January 07, 2011

That Damned Codes

What's Mallard raving about today?

Speech Codes, US Universities.

Standard Mallard Fillmore Poetic Structure:

  1. Dog Whistle
  2. Straw Man
  3. Statement of Victimhood
  4. Mantle of Patriotism

This structure is used in lieu of actual thought, content, or a salient point. Oh and there should be no meter or rhythm of course.


Faster, Harder, More Challenging GeoX said...

Yeah, it's completely mysterious why universities wouldn't want to debate such conservative "ideas" as "homosexuals are horrible sinners," "scientists walk around thinking they're so smart, but they're not," and of course "universities suck and should be defunded." A tragic First-Amendment violation for sure.

Give Tinsley the least possible credit you can give him, though: at least this one scans properly.

James Murton said...

And I'm sure Tinsley is a great supporter of the First Amendment as it applies to left-wing/liberal people. I mean, he'd never start screaming hysterically that anyone left of Rush Limbaugh is a socialist, or that anyone who disagrees with him on anything hates America and if they hate it so much they just go live in Europe, why don't they etc etc etc.

ajm said...

George Carlin had the great routine about how everybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and everybody driving faster than you is a maniac: "No wonder you can't get anywhere when you're only surrounded by idiots and maniacs!"

In Bruce Tinsley's universe, everybody who isn't a drooling, moronic reality-TV fan must be one of them snooty, sneering college-edjumacated types.

No wonder he dines alone.

NickE said...

I sure hope Mallard was glued to his teevee during the Reading Of The Constitution Except For the Parts That Are Embarrassing and Show That It's a Living Document. Because maybe then he can tell us exactly what law Congress made that prohibits the exercise of free speech at private universities.

BTW, at Tinz's footnoted is a list of what the website recognizes as Tinz's hated "speech codes."

I'm typing this via LogMeIn which won't allow me to copy-and-paste, so please hit the link and read 'em yourselves.

Kip W said...

If you can't tell n****r jokes, YOU OPPRESSED!

All you poor rightwing martyrbators can cry on my shoulder when you can truthfully say you don't subscribe to a stifling brand of PC of your own.

(I'll take Tog's word that it scans today. Just as I've learned how to breathe around live stink without smelling much, I've taken to looking at Tin's verse in a way that I don't 'hear' someone trying to read it out loud.)

Tog said...

Not me, Kip, but GeoX. (Does his avatar obscure the end of his name for you, as it does for me?)

But yeah, you're so right. The GOP Chairman of Homeland Security thinks the New York Times should be tried for espionage, but Batshit's bawling because liberals want to take away our freedom?

Batshit has the gall to show his straw-professor torching the Bill of Rights, while remaining dutifully silent about how teabaggers want to run roughshod over the entire Constitution. Unbelievable.

ajm said...

Batshit has the gall to show his straw-professor torching the Bill of Rights, while remaining dutifully silent about how teabaggers want to run roughshod over the entire Constitution.

And I'm trying to locate the strip where Mallard empathized with Helen Thomas losing her job over her comments about Israel. Don't worry, I'll find it sooner or later...

WV: arime. What Tinsley's poems often have trouble with.

David in NYC said...

Apparently, based on his recent scratchings (allegedly comic strips) someone gave Brucie a gift of "Poetry for Dummies" (given his usual lag, it was obviously a pre-Xmas gift).

The "Dummies" part, he has down perfectly. The "Poetry" part? Not so much.

WV: looffet. Combination "loofah" and "fête"; aka party at Bill O'Reilly's place.

deepbeep said...

Yesterday Obama had two mouths, and today the mortarboard has two tassels. Now, why would Bruce Tinsley be seeing double...?

Frank Stone said...

Gotta love that conservative outrage. It's just so conveniently selective, isn't it?

Kip W said...

Sorry, Geox! Yes, the avatar was obscuring the name, but I should have gotten it right anyway. I blush.

Kip W said...




(captcha is "dewistog" — and no, it won't accept dewisgeoX)

rewinn said...

I was going to argue that if "Conservative" speech is necessarily so vile that it transgresses a reasonable code of conduct, perhaps the problem lies not in the code but in the ideology ...

... then I saw the two tassels and started laughing.

You know, King Features must REALLY hate "Mallard Fillmore". They're going out of their way NOT to help him do a good job. Why should they bother? There are thousands of more talented and harder-working cartoonists all over the internet.