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Tuesday, January 04, 2011

Those damned Huns

What's Mallard raving about today?

President Obama, Huns.

Because when you think of Attila, you think of caving in.  And when you think of the Democratic Base, Huns immediately spring to mind.

And early but strong contender for the Worst Metaphor in 2011.

(Note, for future reference, that Mallard is not bleating about the increase in deficit the compromise represents.)


Faster, Harder, More Challenging GeoX said...

So…Obama's betrayed (BETRAYED!) his librul base by compromising on taxes. And he did this because…he's an insane, far-left Marxislamonazsocialist? I mean, we know that's what you think he is. So now Marxislamonazsocialists like to compromise on letting tax cuts for billionaires expire? Or are you just admitting that you're entirely full of shit and you don't actually believe anything you say? Which is it?

Tinsley is cleverly avoiding criticism here by being so transcendently stupid and dishonest that language is literally incapable of describing what he's doing.

Note that this notion of Tinsley's is so mind-bogglingly stupid that I was too preoccupied with its idiocy to even comment on Tinsley's horrible train-wreck of a would-be limerick.

Tog said...


...Okay, I just wrote a Mallard strip. If I copypaste the duck next to the text, does that mean I have a new career?

ajm said...

"Who my cave-in on taxes raises stuns"

That's awkwardly structured. Try incredibly awkwardly.

dlauthor said...

OK, so we're caught up to the tax-cut thing now. Which means we're only a couple days from the DADT, 911 responders, food safety, and START fiesta. Expect Tinshley's writing to get exponentially worse by the week proceeds, as he increases the research intake to numb the pain of the sudden reversal of fortune this entails. By Saturday it should be nothing but an enormous penis-chin with assorted racial slurs scrawled illegibly around it.

dlauthorpuldsmen said...

Ah, irony. "Exponentially worse AS the week proceeds." Must remember not to edit on the fly without triple-checking the outcome.

Kip W said...

It's hard to write verses as weak
As that crappy, half-assed limerick
Though I can murder the rhyming
And awkwardly mess up the timing
Not giving a fuck's the real trick.

ajm said...

Why does Tinsley put "base" in quote marks? Obama did receive about 53% of the popular vote, so his core supporters are a significant portion of the public, not some radical fringe element needing to be ghettoized...

WV: "gradef" -- missing a space to denote Tinsley's performance.

rewinn said...

"... not some radical fringe element needing to be ghettoized..."

To the contrary, mr friend - Tinshley's owners NEED to "ghettoize" ordinary Americans, at least in public conversation. Only if regular Americans consider our own needs to be out-of-bounds will the plutocracy succeed in returning us to the 18th century.

(On the plus side - today's "comic" doesn't express the modern conservative's customary sad grumpiness! But since it's about another person's imaginary gloom, Mallard Fillmore has yet to express a positive emotion this year. What a joyless thing it is to be conservative!)

deepbeep said...

It's Jan 4, and Tinsley is already trying to lock up the Golden Ellipse for Worst Rhyme Scheme. When you can't adequately write a freaking limerick, it's time to consider a line of work that doesn't involve writing.

ajm said...

My bad. The line actually reads:

"Who my cave-in on tax raises stuns"

It's still awkward -- it somehow reads as if "raises" by itself (not "tax raises") is modifying "stuns"...

Kaitlyn said...

He should make a resolution to never ever rhyme again.


He manages to make less sense than usual. That stuns line hurts my head.

Also, wouldn't "abandoning his base" make Tinz happy? So immature - you won't do what I want, you suck. You did what I want, you suck!

Prediction - he will blame Obama or environmentalists for the dead birds and fish.

DiR said...

This is not a resolution.

Neo Tuxedo said...

This is not a resolution.

Neither is "I resolve that no Holocaust happened", but that didn't stop Tinny.