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Wednesday, January 05, 2011

That damned Pop Tart

What's Mallard raving about today?

Pop Tarts.

For those who have long wondered what young starlet, the so-called Pop Tart, so enflames Mallard's passions, we can now reasonably surmise that he has a thing for Lindsey Lohan.

And, in Mallard World, this is doing wonders for her career. Of course, as we all know, in Mallard World everything is pretty much the opposite of whatever he says, so...

Update: Changed the date, will try to get to today's comic at some point.


Faster, Harder, More Challenging GeoX said...

You're a day behind. Today, we're talking about Obama trying to FOOL THE NATION by not revealing his TRUE SELF, whatever the fuck THAT means in Tinsley's gin-soaked mind.

Tog said...

I'm glad you're back, DaveyK, but this is a day late; Mallard's 2011 Pop Tart strip was yesterday's (January 5th).

About that strip: Batshit's hooting it up over someone else wrecking their car while under the influence. For real, Batshit? (Oh, that's right--your own "car troubles" are the result of a grand conspiracy to ruin your reputation *snort*)

Today's strip is a pip. Another crappy limerick, this time about Obama showing his true colors--which is hilarious only in the irony of the timing:

(Reuters) Republicans took power in the House of Representatives on Wednesday with promises of a leaner, more accountable government but softened a pledge of deep and immediate spending cuts that helped them win November's election.

How's THAT crow taste, teabaggers? (Don't worry, though, they'll still stand beside you when it comes to hating Mexicans and homosexuals. And you are, to a man, complete hypocrites about earmarks, so waddle on up to the trough!)

...I AM really glad you're back, though, DaveyK.

Frank Stone said...

Yeah, that Lindsay Lohan, what a train wreck -- masturbating over her was so much more enjoyable back when she was still 13, wasn't it, Mallard? Not that your DVD of I Know Who Killed Me has exactly been gathering dust on the shelf...

James Murton said...

I could be wrong cus I don't particularly follow the whole celebrity thing much, but as far as I know celebrities like Lindsay Lohan and Britney Spears haven't exactly turned their problems into good PR in 'our sick world' (is there a more hilariously hysterical phrase?), since now any time they act or sing or try to do what they became famous for in the first place it will always be seen as a comeback, and will always be viewed through the lens of their personal problems. Neither is anywhere near as popular os successful within their chosen field as they were before their problems, it's just that people who don't follow popular culture will now be more likely to have heard of them because they creep into the news. It's not good PR, it's just that it makes them more famous. The only person who does seem to benefit from stuff like this is Paris Hilton but then she's an anomaly who, being 'famous for being famous' will get attention for anything, just about.

Of course, I'm sure Tinsley covered Mel Gibson's problems with such eager relish, rather than wiping a tear away and saying 'pulled over drunk and raving about the Jews? I've been there brother. I've been there.'

Kip W said...

Tin Eye, you could not pick a clue up
Or obtain a used one from Sherlock Holmes
It's time that you the fuck grew up
And quit trying to write goddamn poems.

(It's not easy to rhyme and scan this badly, but I do it to try and reach him.)

rewinn said...

Another day complaining about something. What a sad, cheerless world conservastives live in!