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Sunday, February 14, 2010

That damned Stand

What's Mallard raving about today?

Valentine's Day, Capitalism.

Conservatives in a nutshell: I refuse to take a stand when something affects other people. But when it affects me...expect Teabagger-like hysterics.


Tog said...

I doubt a reminder is necessary, but still: throughout his "career" (snort) Bruce Tinsley has bawled, at length, about the crass commercialization and/or loss of the true meaning of Christmas, the 4th of July, and the Veterans' Day weekend. (That is, when he didn't forget Veterans' Day outright.)

What makes this strip funny is that Tinsley depicts Chantel (The Liberal Who Would Be Hilarious To Strangle Haw Haw) as seeing straight through Mallard's phony outrage to his cheap-assed, lying core. (She is also far less hysterical than the show Mallard is putting on to mock her ilk.) I doubt Tinsley even realizes what he's done here.

And seriously? Mallard/Tinsley thinks Madison Avenue DOESN'T spend millions, perhaps billions, annually looking for better ways to manipulate people into buying crap that is useless or even dangerous?

Isn't that, after all, what he constantly accuses the "liberal" media and The Nanny State of doing? (CFLs, anyone?) Isn't that what CheneyCo did when they sent Colin Powell out with a little glass vial, and had Condi Rice talk about mushroom clouds?

The Tinsley Paradox: truthful strictly by accident; so utterly insipid he borders on brilliant and wholly unintentional satire.

exanonymous said...

It would have a much better impact if he hadn't spent weeks whining about Valentine's Day beforehand, and so we know he's lying.

Seriously, man up. Or duck up. But learn a little of that personal responsibility you think would fix all problems in the US, okay?

And Valentine's Day probably wouldn't be a big deal to her if you hadn't spent the year stalking and mocking her and ignoring her for whatever boring crap was on television. It isn't a sign of mental illness that she wants a little something more than passive aggressive abuse out of a relationship with you.

Bill the Splut said...

This the exact same "joke" used in yesterday's Wizard of Id. At least Jonny Hart has the excuse of being dead all over, not just from the neck up.

rewinn said...

The War On Valentine's Day Whoo-hooo!

I hate chuck asay said...

Tinsley has the same specious sociopathic attitude towards love that he does towards health care, social services, religion, race, color, creed, belief systems, and drinking.

Word Verification: Distot, Tinsley has the intelligence, maturity and kindness of a small child, but he is an old man, thus, he is a distot.

CW in LA said...

I clicked "pity", but I mean for his wife.

Neo Tuxedo said...

...I apologize for misplacing my comment. It was supposed to be on this post, not yesterday's. Particularly not now I discover that I should've taken my own advice. Don't get out of the boat; the mangoes are never worth it. (I don't know what mangoes have to do with it; ask your local S!N commenter, I guess.)

NotannonNotcow said...

Hey, he at least had multiple panels for today's comic!

dlauthor said...

Is this a salvo in the War on Valentine's Day?

Also, you ungodly fucking idiot, good-quality chocolate (you know, not the crap you buy at the convenience store as an afterthought after you get your six cases of beer for the weekend) has been shown to reduce bad cholesterol -- i.e., make your arteries less likely to clog. Unlike, say, eating box after box of Food-Type Snack Product while watching shitty TV and bitching endlessly about it.

deepbeep said...

Oh please don't tell me Mallard and Chantel are together now. Their dysfunctional relationship includes death threats, Mallard acting like a psycho when running into her, and most recently, breaking and entering. This cartoon has zero character development so it's hard to tell what their story is, but if Chantel shows anything more than fear and revulsion for that duck she has more issues than he does.

And how does anti-consumerism equal anti-capitalism? Mallard's speech sounds like someone with a concussion trying to recap Atlas Shrugged.

Kip W said...

Ground-Duck day.

Tin wakes up, sees the floor before his eyes, and we get six more weeks of belligerence and sniveling.

ps: Every day is Ground-Duck Day.