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Thursday, April 22, 2010

That damned Link

What's Mallard raving about today?

Earth Day, Words.

Next time Mallard is flapping his beak about speech codes on campus, remember...he objects to anyone referring to the Earth as "the Planet."

Why exactly he objects to this is probably best explained by the fact that he's hanging out with and taking all his cues from the lunatic fringe.


Ducky is Right said...

Wow, still on Earth Day? What's next, a week-long expose on why Kittens Are Fuzzy Day is a dumb liberal holiday?

Also; ow, my brain. Does Ducky consider the cash in the register at the local liqueur emporium to still be 'his' money?

deepbeep said...

We shouldn't call it the planet, because there's obviously more than one: on this planet, Baja California is in British Columbia and there is a new continent in the Atlantic Ocean.

Tog said...

Dear God. Okay, fine, let's do this.

Scientists have recently discovered a link between Batshit Brucie and people who refer to Obama as a "Nazi," think a pack of yahoos open-carrying at Starbucks constitutes "a well-regulated militia," refer to health care reform as "the greatest threat to American freedom until whatever Obama does next," insist FOXNews is "fair and balanced," and believe Republicans stand for "fiscal responsibility."

It's a genetic link, of course. After all, they're inbred. (Yes, Batshit, I mean you too.)

exanonymous said...

Those elitist jerks, using words like planet and films. What assholes.
The world would be a much better place if we used multiple days prior to an international day of conservation to instead mock these snobs.

No, my neighbors don't talk to me often. Why do you ask?

Randy said...

@DiR: Especially considering all money these days, whether tax dollars or whatever's in my wallet, is government money (oops, did I forget my "scare quotes"?). See how it's got all that "United States of America" and "Federal Reserve Note" stuff all over it, and that "legal tender" phrase? That's not just there to make it pretty (though Tinsley wouldn't know anything about that anyway). Or does Bruce buy all his booze with company scrip?

@deepbeep: And Central America has been completely flooded out, joining the Pacific and Atlantic Oceans.

P.S. to all: Might enjoy this week's New Adventures of Queen Victoria, if you aren't already reading.

Rootbeer said...

"Panel" 1: liberals are stupid because they use a definite article to refer to the local instance of a thing which exists in multiple!

"Panel" 2: liberals are stupid because some movies today aren't shot onto celluloid film stock, even though many theaters still project from film prints and the metaphor of working with film stock is common in all stages of movie production!

"Panel" 3: liberals are stupid because they believe that once you transfer ownership of an asset to another entity, it no longer belongs to you!

All three rants are equally incoherent, and they have no relevance to each other.

wavydavy said...

So, Tinkley has a problem with the fungibility of words like "film" and "cinema", or "Earth" and "the Planet"? Really?

I'm now expecting his next comic (if by "comic" you mean to the pustulent drivel that comes from the pen of someone whose IQ is somewhere south of room temperature) --

Why Roget's Thesaurus is a communist/fascist/socialist/islamic/terrorist/liberal/progressive plot. Oh, wait -- since he's opposed to alternate words with similar meaning, I guess he will only be able to use one of those adjectives.

rewinn said...

Punch line?

Anyone see a punch line?

If the joke is that saying "The Planet" and "Films" is elitist snobbery and therefore ('s the joke...) connected to Loving Government Ha-Ha-Ha! then the only funny that this should be put in the context of a scientific discovery.

I mean, what's more "elitist" than science?

dlauthor said...

Yeah, no kidding. When did Tinshley start believing in science? I'm sure we could find (or pay for) two or three scientists to disagree with this conclusion, thus invalidating it utterly dontchaknow.

Come on, Brucie. Teach the controversy. TEACH THE CONTROVERSY!

Kip W said...

Randy, Tin doesn't have to go to liquor stores because they pay him in liquor. It's a win-win. He wins because he doesn't have to pay taxes on his booze, and because he doesn't have to go outside, he saves on shoes and pants. The syndicate wins because they just refill all his various empties from a big barrel they get at a 'factory seconds' distributor.

Toots McGee said...

Meanwhile, at Muppet Labs...
And the link is....this duck! (She's a witch, burn her!)
He blinded me with science!
Batman was a scientist!
Film at eleven.
Pretentious, moi?
And now a word from our sponsor...
You'll like those tiny little teabags, in Tinsley Tea (and that starts with T and that rhymes with P and that stands for Pablum! New with even less substance!)

Help I'm a duck!

Factinista said...

First, Mallard, you and your wingnut buddies can stop incessantly referring to the US as "the Republic." Maybe after that we'll talk.

Bill the Splut said...

Ha ha, we should call Earth Day "The Planet Day!" That's how dumb it is to think about the environment one day a year!

Remember this string of cartoons in 2011, when The Ronald Reagan Centennial begins. As it uses Republican math, the centennial will last for two years.

No, I am not making that up.

Bill the Splut said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Ducky is Right said...

No chance of me reading that link, Bill, but any chance of them mentioning Ol' Ronnie's administration committing high treason and selling weapons to our good friends Iran?

ajm said...

If conservatives can't hear "the planet" instead of "Earth" without completely losing their shit, can we really trust them to handle the economy and global terrorism?

Kaitlyn said...

Um, I watch foreign films, and most of the ones I watch (Indian ones) are not like the cliched foreign film you think of. Quite the opposite.

Anyway, they're usually referred to as films by the Indian press. It's not elitist, trust me.

And I haven't heard of a concerted movement to call earth "the planet", though I can think of sayings like "we gotta save the planet" from pollution or invading aliens or whatever.

There, I made more sense than he did.

My punch line? REMITYP! Yeah, you think about that and laugh, it's so funny.

Beef Wellington said...

Quite frankly I'm amazed brucie did'nt depict earth as a flat pancake in the center of the universe.

I think tins is pissed because someone told him he had to recycle, which in turn would mean he would have to wriggle out of his ass groove on his couch ann walk 3 feet to his rascal scooter.

Kip W said...

The Planet is the paper Clark Kent works at.